To Walk To My Loves Arms
by Galene
Summary: Usagi is left with a broken heart and a wounded body, and at Cherry Tree she meets just the person to heal her. (usagixmamoru)
1. Default Chapter

Hello, this is the beginning of my latest creation… don't murder me if it's short… it has just begun… 

HUGE thanks out to Heather (talk of angels) she's really helped me a lot with this…. So thank you ever so very much.. for putting up with me… luv. ya.

Hmm… its SUMMER!!! And I've decided to put this up again!! Why? Cause its summer… no da… and I think I'll have more time to work on it. Also I'm at this point in Prophecy where I'm trying out a couple of diff. versions of the next chapter trying to decide which I like best. 

So… hope u like… 

To walk to my loves arms

_to walk to your arms_

_ is all I desire_

_ my every wish shall be fulfilled _

_the day I enter them of my own accord.._

Chapter 1

The confident eighteen year old walked through the front door of her boyfriends' mansion, and was assaulted by the sound of people partying all around her. As she entered the main room, a group of her best friends approached.

"Hey Usa!!!" They greeted their friend, attempting to lead her away from the dance floor, and through the crowd…

"Guys, what's up?" She questioned as they led her further and further away from the party.

"Um, nothing...." Stated Rei, hating having to lie to her best friend.

"Well then, let's dance!" exclaimed Usagi, starting to head back towards the crowd.

"Shit!!" Muttered Minako under her breath. "We have to stop her!" She exclaimed, tearing into the crowd in a vain attempt to stop her friend.

On the dance floor, in the middle of the crowd, Seiya was having the time of his life. He was dancing with a petite brunette, and as a fast song began to play, Usagi walked onto the dance floor and saw him through the crowd. He was kissing the brunette, holding her tightly against him, and very much looking like he was extremely interested in being more then just friends with her.

"Oh my god! What's he doing with Janice?" she whispered to herself, no longer excited about the party-or seeing Seiya for that matter. 

"Why? What did I do?" She asked herself as he pulled the auburn haired girl a little closer. Then, apparently spotting Usagi, he

gave her a little wave and kissed Janice once again. 

That was all Usagi could take, and she dashed back out of the party, her friends desperately calling for her to wait. She ran out the door, her long blonde hair streaming behind her, and reached the parking lot in record time.

 Quickly she jumped into the driver's seat of her Beatle, eyes threatening to overflow with tears as her heart began to ache.

"Usagi, wait!" Her friends yelled after her, reaching the parking lot just in time to see her drive off. Usagi sped off down the road,

just wanting to get away from the party, and the humiliation…..

The rain pelted down on her windshield, she sped onwards, flipping the windshield wipers to high only to find that they were no match for the torrent of rain pouring down. Eyes focused on the road, she tried to concentration the road ahead of her. The glare of headlights was all the warning she received as she rounded a bend in the road, desperately she tried to turn the wheel, pumping the brakes while trying to avoid a head-on collision with the truck…

closer and closer it came, filling her wind shield with the glare of unavoidable headlights.

"I'm going to die...." she whispered, taking her hands off the wheel as the side of the trailer slammed into the front of her little car, pushing it backwards off the edge of the road. Over and over the car rolled; the airbags inflating in a vain attempt to prevent Usagi from hurting her head. Smash! The car rolled again, hitting a bump.

Usagi flew sideways into the door, the blow knocking her unconscious. The small car continued its descent, a now unconscious teen in the drivers seat. Colliding head on with a large tree, the front of the car was smashed in towards the drivers seat,

effectively pinning Usagi's unconscious form into place….

Usagi didn't know how long she had been out, but she awoke feeling dazed. All of her small body seemed to hurt.. well, everything but her legs.

"Hello?" She called. "Somebody, help me!" Her voice surprising her with its calm tone.

A fireman soon appeared outside the car, and made his way to the giant hole in the wind shield.

"Miss, are you okay?" He asked her.

"I don't know." Usagi replied. "Please, just get me out of here!"

"We're working on it right now, just remain calm." Stated the fireman, who then left her line of view, only to return moments

later with a metal saw in his hands. Steadily he began cutting away the metal of the door.

Inside the vehicle Usagi relaxed. 'There, he's right there. I'll be ok.' She thought to herself. 

Then the smell of gasoline reached her nostrils and panic set in.

"No, don't let me die!!!" She unconsciously screamed, "I don't want to die!!" As groups of firemen armed with extinguishers approached the hood of the car, the man cutting on her door tapped the window in reassurance.

The scent of gasoline had became nearly unbearable by the time her door was finally cut off. A face appeared.

"Do you hurt anywhere?"

Usagi nodded in response. "I hurt all over, except for my legs. I can't feel anything below my waist."

"Ok. We'll have you out in no time, just remain calm," stated the fireman. 

Then, leaning in, he began to cut away the metal pinning her to the seat.

"Will I be ok?" she asked the fireman as he worked.

"Of course." he replied, focusing on his work. The sound of a helicopter broke into Usagi's consciousness as the final piece of

the entrapping metal came free, and the paramedics moved in to pull her carefully out of the wreckage.

"Do you hurt anywhere?" they asked her.

Usagi attempted to nod, but instead let out a howl of pain, as the slight movement of her neck caused a burning fire to race through

her body.

"I...I hurt everywhere. Except my legs." She said, when she had recovered enough to speak.

"Ok. I'm going to lift you out and place you on a stretcher; then you will be raised into a helicopter and taken to a hospital." the paramedic began to gently lift her out, trying not to cause her more pain.

Usagi could feel each individual place where her body touched his, and she tried to hold back her screams of pain when his arms

tightened around her middle. Her head pounded, and as she felt herself loosing consciousness the last words that drifted into her

foggy mind were,

"So young....it really is a pity…."

Then she blacked out….

Well  what do you think? I should have more up soon…. Since I have the 1st 4 chapters done.. Please review and let me know if I should bother putting up the rest.

Ttyl 

Sugar


	2. ch1

Many thanks to Angels, as I've told you many times…. You are truly an angel for putting up with me…. and thanks more then words can express for fixing this up… once again a marvellous job… 

_Give them a chance there not useless yet_

_Don't take them away, I'll need them yet_

_For in order to walk, my legs play a role_

_So make the right choice to help me reach my goal_

CHAPTER 2   
  
"Beep, beep, beep." Went the heart monitor as Usagi regained consciousness with groan.

 'Where am I?' She wondered, looking around the white room that smelled of disinfectant. It was filled with strange, scary looking equipment.   
Slowly she tried to sit up, but found that she couldn't seem to make her body espond the way she wanted it too.   
Footsteps sounded, and she turned her head towards the noise "Shingo?" she questioned, looking at her brother. "Where am I?" 

"OKAASAN! She's awake!" Shingo yelled as he plopped down in the chair beside the bed.   
"How are you feeling?" He asked her.   
"Ergh… not too good." Usagi responded ruefully as her mother dashed in.   
"Usagi-chan! Thank goodness!!" Her mother exclaimed, rushing to the bedside to give her a kiss.   
"Okaasan! Where am I?" She questioned, looking around her. Then she looked down at her arm, which seemed to be stuck full of needles.   
"Usagi, are you okay? Do you hurt? Do you want me to call a nurse?" Her mother asked her, seeming to avoid Usagi's question.   
"No, I don't hurt and yes, I'm okay." replied Usagi   
"Okay....Well, if you do hurt, just push this little red button and a nurse will come. Okay, honey?"   
"Yes mom. Where am I?" Usagi asked again, hoping to get an answer.   
"Usa, do you remember what happened?" Questioned her mother, trying to avoid the question for now.   
Usagi concentrated hard, trying to remember what possibly could have happened to get her mother so worried.   
"No. Please, no." She breathed as the memory of the accident came to her. Everything flashed through on fast-forward....the party, Seiya, truck… the accident… everything.   
Usagi tried hard to remain strong; she didn't want to worry her mother even more, but she couldn't help it. Slowly, the tears just seemed to leak out, no matter how hard she tried to hold them back.   
"Shhh. Usa, it's okay…" Soothed her mother, placing her arms gently about her daughter.   
"Okaasan, what happened to me? How...how long has it been…?" Usagi asked, as the paramedics final words sifted into her brain… "So young… it really is a pity…"   
"Shh Usa… shh… you're fine. Usagi...nothing...too bad happened, it's just that..." Began her mother, then turning to Shingo. "Shingo…. could you, if you don't mind...?" Shingo took the hint and left, closing the door softly behind him.   
"Oh Mama...it's my legs, isn't it? I....I can't move them at all…… and they don't hurt or anything"   
"Yes, Usa...Your legs, they're hurt badly…but it's nothing physiotherapy can't fix. We'll have you back on your feet in no time."   
"Back on my feet?" Usagi exclaimed, disbelieving. "There's nothing WRONG with my legs!!" She insisted, pushing her mother away. "I could walk now if I wanted too!!"   
A water smile graced her mothers face, but she didn't dare tell her daughter otherwise. The doctors' had warned her that Usagi may react similarly at first, and that she shouldn't push her.   
"Mama, where's dad?" Usagi asked, yearning to see him.   
"Right outside. I'll go get him." Ikuko replied, passing her hand over Usagi's head as she stood to retrieve Kenji.   
  


Grateful, Usagi slumped back onto the cushions, desperately pushing away all thoughts of her accident. By the time her dad entered, she was fast asleep.   
  
The next few weeks were hard on the Tuskino family, for another infection had crept up on Usa, and none of them were prepared for it.   
Usagi was delirious, thrashing about in her sleep and crying out, "NO! NO!! Don't let me die…"   
She battled hard against the infection, undergoing more operations until the infection only remained in her legs. Her parents now faced one of the hardest choices they would ever have to make: whether or not to give consent for the amputation of Usagi's legs.   
  
The doctors were divided; some said that she could keep her legs, that eventually she'd be able to walk again. Others, however, maintained the opinion that Usagi's legs should be amputated, that not only would she never walk again, but the infection would, in the end, kill her. Ikuko was torn: on one hand, she may choose amputation, and Usagi would never be able to walk again. However, if she chose to let Usagi keep her legs, there was the chance that she may die. After many hours of praying and debating, Usagi was allowed to keep her legs.   
  
The battle against the infection carried on, even after the operation. It wasn't looking too good for Usagi, but when it seemed as if she had given up, a single cry escaped her lips, startling the nurse who had come to give her some medication.   
"Wait!! Wait for me!" She screamed, her voice loud, insistent. Then her eyes opened wide, before slamming shut…   
  
It was two days before Usagi regained total consciousness, or at least as conscious as you can get through a fog of painkillers.   
Her luminous blue orbs opened once again, to the sight of her father resting peacefully in the chair at her bedside, which was now covered with many cards, ballons, and flowers.   
"Obassan?" Her soft voice questioned.   
"Usagi?" He whispered, turning to face her, a huge smile of relief on his face "Usagi, it's so good to see you awake!!"   
"Oba, what are you talking about? I must have just drifted off for a nap."   
"Usagi, it's been a week… since then." He gently corrected her.   
"A week??"   
Her father nodded in reply.   
"Oh…" she mouthed. "What happened to me…?"   
"You got an infection, and it took you a week to battle it off…"   
"Then it really was a dream…" Usagi muttered to herself before asking,   
"Oba-san… where are all my friends? Why haven't they been to see me?"   
"Usa..you're in the ICU"   
"ICU? Why?" she questioned thinking…. 'I can't be.. that's where really sick people go…deathly sick people..' she thought   
"I'm NOT GOING TO DIE!" she stated fiercely…   
Her father smiled at her then said, "That's the spirit… I always knew you were a fighter…"   
"Obassan, is there anything to drink? I'm thirsty." Asked Usagi, watching as her father stood up and handed her a glass of water.   
"Arigatou"   
"Stay put… I'm going to get your mother." Stated her father as he handed her the glass.   
"Hai.."   
But it was not her mother whom entered the door a few moments later, it was a doctor.   
"Tuskino-san..?"   
"Who are you?" Usagi demanded   
"I'm Dr. Lawrence, and I just wanted to let you know that you are one lucky little lady."   
'Huh?' She thought, 'What's he talking about?'   
"Usagi.. you are very lucky that your parents decided against amputation because my colleagues and I think that you have a very good chance of being able to walk again."   
'Walk again? Amputaion?' Usagi thought 'Must be someone else, you're fine, there's nothing wrong with you. You have two arms, two legs… everything is here. It's not you...' Out loud she said, "What do you mean by that? I already know how to walk!"   
"Yes...well..you're going to have to go for some rehab. And I have suggested that your parents place you at Cherry Hollow Rehabilitation Center, to give you the chance to walk again."   
"Excuse me, sir, but I believe you have the wrong person! My legs are fine, I am fine!! I know how to walk and I don't need to go to any rehabilitation center!" Usagi stated, her voice rising to a shout. 

"GET OUT!" she yelled at him, pointing to the door. "LEAVE ME ALONE! I AM FINE!"   
The doctor obeyed her wishes… giving her a pitying glance as he was about to leave. "You can't walk right now, Usagi. Your legs are too weak…"   
Defiantly Usagi glared back at him… 

"I can too walk!" She told herself, then very carefully tried to lift a leg, to swing it over the side of the bed.   
Her leg didn't budge. 'Oh my god!.... I can't move it!' She thought, worried that perhaps the doctor was right. 'It's okay, it's probably nothing. You're just tired.' She told herself, and then leaned back against the pillows to doze until her mother arrived.   
  
Two days later Usagi was moved out of the ICU and to another floor. Her new room was bright and sunny, and painted a pale yellow.   
She was excited, her friends had phoned the night before and had promised to come and visit her. She could hardly wait to see everyone, especially Seiya, having decided that the party that night had been a mistake, and that he must have been drunk, or high.   
Her friends entered the room around 11:00am to find Usagi still asleep…   
Seiya, who had come along against Rei's wishes, leaned over and gave Usagi a kiss on the forehead. Groggily Usagi opened her eyes.   
"Hello, Odango." Whispered Seiya, looking at his girlfriend lying pale and helpless on the bed.   
"Seiya, Rei, Mina, AMI!" squealed Usagi, excited to see them.   
"How are you doing?" Mina asked   
"Not too bad." She replied, watching the way her friends moved about the room.   
"Great!" Said Seiya…   
"So, what's been happening?" Demanded Usagi, and she listened patiently as her friends brought her up to date on all the local gossip, leaving out everything that had to do with Seiya and Janice. Deciding that their friend was in enough pain, and didn't need to learn about them just yet, they put it off for now. By the time that they had finished it was near lunch time.   
"Usagi, how would you feel about some pizza?" asked Minako, her stomach rumbling audibly.   
"Pizza! That sounds great!" squealed Usagi, relieved at the idea of eating something other than purple "fake" grape flavoured jello.   
"Okay! I'll go get some!"   
"I'll come help" said Ami, following Minako out of the room leaving Usagi and Rei together.   
"So, how are you feeling?" asked Rei, walking to the window.   
"Well...everyone here says I can't walk, but that's silly. And they want me to go to a rehab center." Usagi began.   
"Usa-chan...I know it's hard.." Began Rei.. thinking back to when she broke her leg and had to hobble around for a month, "But…What they're saying is probably true."   
"No, it's not Hino Rei! Get that thought out of your head!" Stated Usagi. "I'm fine, there's nothing wrong!"   
"Usagi, come on! Face the facts! Your legs, you can't feel them.. and have you tried to move them?" stated Rei, impatient with her friends inabilitly to face the light of reason.   
"Yes, I have, and..and.." Sputtered Usagi. Then she suddenly broke into tears. "Rei, I don't..I can't.."   
"Usagi-chan..." whispered Rei, giving her friend a hug. "Everything will be fine…."   
  
Later that evening…   
"Mom, what do they look like?" asked Usagi… thinking of how her legs used to look, long, muscular… stretching out in front of her from beneath a short skirt as she sat on the grass.   
"Um...They're fine Usagi, just a lot thinner then they used to be." Stated Usagi's mom, telling her daughter a half truth.   
"Really?" asked Usagi hopefully. "I want to see them."   
"Honey, I don't think that's such a good idea."   
"Mom, I have to see them before I go to rehab. I want to know what it is I have to live with."   
Just then the doctor entered on his routine check.   
"How are you feeling Usagi?" He asked her.   
"Fine. But, I want to see my legs"   
"Um, I don't think that's a good idea…" stated the Doctor.   
"Why not? They're my legs, and I want to see." She turned to her mother. 

"If there really isn't anything too different about them, then why won't you let me see them? You said that the only change was that they were a little skinnier."   
Seeing the determined look in her eyes, the doctor sent a helpless look at Mrs. Tuskino. When she just shrugged, the doctor sighed…   
"Let me go and get some help. I'll be right back."   
  
"Are you sure about this, Usa?" asked her mother.   
"Yes, mom. I have to know."   
  
The two doctors returned five minutes later with a bag of clean bandages.   
"You still sure you want to do this?" Questioned Dr. Lawrence   
"Hai!" she replied, and sat up ready to look and see what her legs looked like.   
The two doctors worked carefully to remove the bandages, hands gentle as they lifted and lowered her legs to release them from their white shrouds. Yards and yards of the stuff seemed to come off, and her legs got thinner and thinner; then, on the count of three, the doctors removed the last constricting layers.   
  
Taking a deep breath, Usagi looked down at her legs.   
They were white, so white. Thin and scrawny, with red "zipper marks" stretching up them.   
They were hideous, and Usagi blanched just looking at them. Tears sprouted from her eyes as she choked out,   
"Cover them…"   
The doctors worked quickly, but before they were through Usagi had lost all hope of ever being able to stand on her own again.   
  
The next day her friends visited, and she loathed them. She hated them because they had the use of their legs, and they just took it for granted.   
Every sun-browned, strong limb mocked her and drove her further into depression. Her thought turned to ways of escape, for there was no way that she, Tuskino Usagi, was ever going to live in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.   
  
That night after everyone had left, the nurse came to give Usagi her nightly dosage of painkiller. Carefully Usagi placed the pill in her mouth, and made a huge show out of swallowing it, when really she had hidden it under her tongue.   
As the nurse turned around to leave, Usagi took the pill out of her mouth and wrapped it in a tissue.   
"One down," she said as she closed the top drawer of her nightstand. 

"But I wonder how many I need to go?"

Hi angels….

Two days later… 

Usagi awoke early after a long and restless night… 

"should I tell him?" she asked herself thinking of her legs… 

"or shouldn't i?" Usagi sighed…. She just couldn't make up her mind… 

"well he loves me... and he has a right to know!" she thought….  

later that day… when her friends came to visit… she was careful to be the only one to reach into the drawer…. Not wanting her friends to discouver her pitiful stash of painkillers… and when everyone was about to leave….she asked seiya to remain behind… 

"Seiya… there's something I … I need to talk to you about" Usagi stated looking up at him with her big blue orbs… 

"ok, catch you guys later…." He said…. Waving everyone else out the door….and moving to sit in the chair beside her bed.

"Seiya…. i.. I need to tell you about me legs….." Usagi began

"what about them?" he questioned… guilt welling up inside of him like water from a spring…. 'These visits were so hard…' he thought… for he knew he was partially to blame for Usagi's condition.. 

"well…. Sieya…. They…. They look different…" 

"yeah…. They're just thinner and stuff.. I know… but physio is going to change that"

"seiya…" stated Usagi… smiling at his hopeful tone… "they are worse…" and began describing exactly what they looked like… while trying not to make them sound too gruesome. 

When she was done…. Sieya stared at her in disbelief…. His thoughts running to Janice…. And her perfect legs, eyes, figure smile….. and taking a deep breath soothed, 

"is ok.. Odango… you'll be fine. Your legs will heal..and everything will be perfect…" 

"but… but… what if they aren't?" Usagi asked… 

"they will be!" he stated with assurance.. then "don't worry Odango… you'll be good as new…" and leaned over to give her a long… soft kiss… 

breaking it off…. Seiya turned flashing her a querky grin, and left the room… "see ya round Odango" 

"bye seiya…." She called after him…. Knowing… that things between them could never, and would never be the same… for in her heart of hearts, she blamed Seiya for what had happened to her… and somehow she knew…that their relationship…was no longer on the same level hat it had been before the party. 

Usagi spent the rest of the afternoon, sitting in bed reading Manga, and watching old TV shows and soaps..    before finally drifting off to sleep for a few hours… 

That night…. When the nurse came to give Usagi her nightly dosage of painkillers Usagi questioned, 

"I can't die from these things can i?" 

the startled nurse stared at her unbelieving… 

"that's not what I meant… its just that I've seem to be taking so many…" 

"oh…. Well you have nothing to worry about.. it would take quite a few of these to kill a person…" 

"ok… " replied Usagi… once again pretending to swallow the pill… 

after the nurse left…. usagi spent a lot of time lost in thought…toying with the idea of taking the pills….. but in the end decided against it.. knowing that they would still be there…. 

waiting..

Two weeks later…  

"hello Usagi-Chan!" stated Rei wondering what type of mood her friend would be in today…  over the past couple of weeks Usagi had become more and more irritable, restless, and a lot less fun to visit… she watched people move with envy and desire written clearly on her face. Everything that used to be important to her now seemed not to matter, and Rei was really beginning to wonder why. 

Ami and Minako had also noticed the change, the way Usagi no longer seemed excited about little things, such as Pizza, and sunsets. Her thoughts had instead turned more morbid causing them to worry, for Usagi had always been full of life, and everyone had always thought she would be able to hold out.. and remain strong  no matter what the circumstance. 

"hi Rei" said Usagi watching as dark haired friend walked towards the window, with her long tanned legs clearly showing from beneath a short red skirt.

"so how you been?" questioned Ami…

"oh…. Not too bad, just wasting away getting paler and pastyier.. pretty soon I think even bleached sheets will have some competition for being whiter.." 

Minako strangled a laugh..  and said… "well…you'll be leaving for that cherry tree place tomorrow…. And soon you'll be back on your feet and out in the sun.."

"yeah…. If I can actually walk on these things" stated  Usagi..

changing the subject Ami said "Seiya said to tell you he'd be by around 12:00" 

"really?" asked Usagi perking up a bit "I can't wait!" 

The girls sighed…. This was a clear indicator that Usagi.. was feeling ok…

"well…. Why don't I get us something to drink?" stated Minako.. " I don't know about you but I'm parched!" 

ami laughed and left with her…. 

Coming away from the window Rei sat on the edge of the bed… trying to think what would be the best way to explain why seiya was coming… 

Seeing Rei's expression darken Usagi cringed inwardly wondering what had happened…. And when Rei's fiery eyes focused on Usagi she said… 

"Usa.. there is something you have to know… before Seiya comes…. He wanted me to tell you…" 

"what?" asked Usagi

"well….. there's no easy way to put this……. But…. Seiya is seeing Janice…."

"dating her?" asked Usagi… her voice devoid of emotion.. 

"yes….. Dating…. They were seeing eachother even before the incident…"

"that WHORE!" 

"well you know Janice… she's loved seiya for a long time…. And well…. When he looked interested she invited him…" 

"that bastard!" Usagi muttered under her breath.. "I can't believe him.."

"well… he'll be here any moment…. So don't do anything rash… although… I wouldn't blame you if you killed him…" 

"Rei!" Usagi exclaimed with a laugh… watching her friend exit… and Seiya enter soon after… 

"hey Odango" he greeted her…. A box of chocolates in hand… and cheerful smile on his face.. 

"hi seiya… what did you want to talk to me about?" 

"well.. Usagi…this is not because of your legs or anything… I was going do this anyways…. But…" 

"just say it seiya….. Rei warned me…"

"she did?" 

"yeah…. "

"oh…. Well…. Then I guess you know… that I'm interested in Janice….and well we're going out now… "

"sure….. Seiya….and you were cheating on me with her before…" stated Usagi bitterly…. 

Seiya said nothing just sat there looking extremely guilty… 

"GET OUT" stated Usagi…. "I don't want to see you.." she finished in a strangled tone…. 

"Usagi….. I'll always care about you….. you really…"

"shut up!" Usagi raged… "just get he hell out of here!"

then Rei appeared at the door…..glaring at him… "you heard her…. GET OUT!" 

seiya didn't need to be told again… and with Rei's disapproving eyes on him… slowly left the room… 

'that's it…' Usagi thought to herself  'tonight… I go…with what I have… it should be enough…' 

as Rei re-entered the room and walked to the window… Usagi thought… 

'besides…. I'll never be able to walk again.. I'm useless and wheel chair bound… I might as well go now…. Before I go to cherry tree…' 

"Usagi?" questioned Rei…. Her eyes focusing on the tears streaming from her friends eyes…… "are you ok?" 

Usagi….still deep in thought ignored… her friend… then realising Rei had asked her something smiled, 

"could you brush my hair?" 

"sure…." Stated Rei… reaching into the drawer feeling around for Usagi's brush… 

for a moment… Usagi sat tense… wondering if her friends questioning hand would find the crumpled piece of Kleenex stuffed into the back corner.. 

"PIZZA!" yelled shingo… startling Rei… and as she jumped in shock….the drawer of the dresser fell out to the floor…. Scattering its contents everywhere….with the pills fortunately landing within their tissue still hidden 

"shingo!" exclaimed Usagi… closely watching Rei replace the contents of the drawer and sighed… as she picked up the tissue by the corners.. 

"hey, sis…" shingo said moving towards the bed with the pizza box in his arms… then tripping over a loose shoelace he fell bumping into Rei.. causing her to drop the tissue…. Which opened like a flower revealing the stash of rose coloured pills within…. 

Rei's dark eyes flew open in surprise….as they met Usagi's…… then biting back a comment she quickly pulled back up the corners of the tissue and turned to shingo… struggling to contain her disgust… she marched to the bathroom calling after herself…. 

"shingo…. Could you go and get us a couple of sodas from the lobby?" she asked

"sure…" he replied running back out of the room…. 

After he left the sound of a toilet flushing came from the bathroom and Rei soon emerged shaking with rage, and turned her full attention on her blonde friend… 

"WHAT, were those??" 

"um…. Painkillers" Usagi stated calmly…

"and What were they doing in you drawer… you weren't actually planning … taking them were you?" 

"what if I was?" Usagi shot back….

"Usagi! Come on….. you are going to get better…."

"that's what everyone always says….. you'll get better… but what do you know…." Usagi demanded tears beginning to form in her eyes…as she tried to explain,

 "you have two good strong legs….. and no idea what I'm going through….. what if your wrong? What if I can't walk…. "

"maybe I don't know what your going through…. But I was here… I heard your mom… do you know she cried… non stop, and prayed for hours, you weren't there…. you didn't have to listen to her crying " God, please don't take my baby" My GOD usa.. we've been friends for ages….and this is one thing I never thought I'd live to see you do…. really suicide?" 

"Rei…. Please…. I can't live in a wheel chair forever…"  

"Usagi…. You aren't going to…. "

"please Rei… I probably never would have taken them… but I needed the option. I needed to have the choice… to know that I wasn't totally hopeless….."

"that is the most selfish thing I've ever heard come out of your mouth!" Rei stated..

"well…. You think that terminally ill patients have the right to end their own lives…"

"Usagi… your not terminally ill….. you are strong, and healthy…. Your legs will get better!" said Rei.  Opening her skirt to reveal the pills… 

"Rei.?" Questioned Usagi…. 

"you are right…. You have can decide if you want to kill yourself or not… but if you do… I'll never forgive you…. For the pain that you'll cause your mom, and ami, Minako…. Everyone….. and me… Usagi…. Your almost like a sister…." Stated Rei…. Tears threatening to spill from her own eyes……as she looked into the innocent tear-filled orbs of her friend… 

"Rei-Chan…. i…. I don't think I could have done it anyways…."

Rei smiled wriley….. "well…. Promise me that when put these back… you won't take them until you've given cherry tree, and phsyio a try"

"Rei…." Stated Usagi.. "I hate a coward to you know…. " and smiled watery at her friend. 

Rei smiled largely then…. And gave Usagi a hug…. Before rushing to flush the pills as Shingo came back into the room followed by Ami and Minako… 

"so… what did we miss?" Mina-Chan asked… 

Rei and Usagi… just looked at each-other… before Usagi said, "I'll miss you guys so much…..when I go to Cherry tree tomorrow…" 

"aw…. Usagi… we'll visit you…" promised Ami… 

"I know.." stated Usagi… catching their eyes…. 

Usagi's friends  were not coming the following day, for Usagi was moving out to Cherry Hill. 

Early that moring around 9:00am….. Usagi's parents arrived, to help her pack all her things, and sign the discharge papers….. 

By 9:30 Usagi was on her way…. Out her father wheeling her along. As she passed many of the hospital staff waved good-bye… and wished her the best on her road to recovery

Down the elevator….. and out the door…. Went Usagi….enduring the stares of curious people….as she went by…. 

Finally they reached the car….and everything seemed to be going well…

As the car began to move, an eerie feeling overcame Usagi… 

FLASH!! Car skidding on the wet road, headlights….in the wind shield…. Usagi's breathing accelerated….. she was confined…. 

"STOP!" she yelled panic setting in….. "I have to ….. Let me out!!" 

"but…. We just started…." Claimed her dad… 

"Let me out…." Usagi responded frantically pounding at the window…. 

"shh… shh…. Usagi… its ok…. Your fine.. I have something for you.." stated her mother…  as her father pulled the car over… 

"I should have given this to you before…" said Usagi's mother handing her a pill and a bottle of water….. "it will help" she soothed…. As Usagi swallowed the pill. 

Soon the tranquillezer did its job…..and Usagi felt herself slip into an uncaring calm daze…. As sleep overcame her….. 

When Usagi' awoke… she was greeted with the site of large black and white sign with pink cherry blossoms on the corner reading, 

"welcome to cherry hill, recuperation center" 

'as if they needed a sign…' Usagi thought… looking out the window….and the large expanse of green dotted with people manoeuvring wheel chairs….. down over wide paths….that all led up to a large white building…. Surrounded by blossoming pink cherry trees….. 

"were here…." Stated Usagi's mother…. As the car pulled up in front of the large double doors….. 

"well… here I go… no turning back now….."Usagi stated… as her father wheeled her through the doors and into the large lobby….

"hi!" said a young voice and as Usagi turned her head towards the sound she was greeted by the sight of…… 


	3. ch3

Thank you MANDEE!!! You're a savior… I've been trying to remember what the name of the book was… I read it ages ago and couldn't remember

THANKS TOO EVERYONE whom reviewed….. much appreciated Luv, & huggles out to all of you…

NOTE: I got the background idea for this story from a book called "Don't let me die" I forget who its by L still enjoy!!

_A turmoil__ within_

_Shall I live, or die? _

_Do I dare to give phsyio a try? _

_Will you cry, if I am gone, _

_will__ you remember the words to our song?_

_Yet I remain another day, to try and live _

_even__ with the pain_

Chapter 3

Two days later…   
  
Usagi awoke early after a long and restless night. She had tossed and turned for hours, unable to relax with all of the events of the past few weeks piling up in her mind.   
"Should I tell him?" she asked herself. "Or shouldn't I?" Usagi sighed, thinking of her legs.   
She just couldn't make up her mind…   
"Well, he loves me, and he has a right to know!" She decided, hoping that she wouldn't regret what she was going to do.   
  
Later that day…   
  
When her friends came to visit, she was careful to be the only one to reach into the drawer, not wanting her friends to discover her pitiful stash of painkillers. 

When everyone was leaving, Usagi quietly asked Seiya to remain behind, hoping to talk to him alone.   
"Seiya, there's....something I...I need to talk to you about." Usagi stammered, looking up at him with her naive azure eyes.   
"Okay. Hey, I'll catch you guys later!" he said, waving everyone else out the door, and moving to sit in the chair beside her bed.   
"Seiya, I need to tell you about my legs." Usagi began.   
"What about them?" He asked, guilt covering his heart like a thick blanket. 'These visits are so damn hard.' He thought to himself. 

He knew he was partially to blame for Usagi's condition, although he tried to deny it.   
"They look....different." She stated slowly, as if she was afraid of how he might respond.   
"Yeah, I noticed. They're thinner and stuff. But physio is going to change that."   
"Seiya," started Usagi slowly, but still smiling at his hopeful tone. "They're worse then just being thinner." 

Slowly she began describing exactly what they looked like, while trying not to make them sound too gruesome.   
When she was done, Sieya stared at her in disbelief. His thoughts ran to Janice, and her perfect legs, eyes, figure, smile. 

Taking a deep breath, he tried to sooth Usagi telling her that she would be fine,  
"It's okay Odango, you'll be fine. Your legs will heal and everything will be perfect, just like it used to be."   
"But...what if they don't?" Usagi asked.   
"They will be," he stated with assurance, "don't worry Odango, you'll be good as new." then he leaned over to give her a long, soft kiss.   
Breaking it off, Seiya turned to her. Flashing her a quirky grin, he left the room, calling out,

 "See ya round Odango!" as he walked away.   
"Bye Seiya!" She called after him, knowing in her heart that things between them could never, and would never, be the same, for deep down in her heart of hearts she blamed Seiya for what had happened to her, and somehow she knew that their relationship was not as it once was, before the incident at the party.   
  
Usagi spent the rest of the afternoon sitting in bed reading manga, and watching old TV shows and soaps before finally drifting off to sleep for a few hours.   
  
That night, when the nurse came to give Usagi her nightly dosage of painkillers, she was startled by Usagi's abrupt question.   
"I can't die from these things, can I?"   
The nurse stared at her, bewildered.   
"I mean, it's just that I've been taking so many...I was just wondering if that's safe."   
"Oh, it's alright, you have nothing to worry about. It would take quite a few of these to kill a person."   
"Okay," replied Usagi, once again pretending to swallow the pill.   
After the nurse left, she spent a lot of time lost in thought, toying with the idea of taking the pills, of just ending it all there and then, but in the end she decided against it, knowing that they would still be there the next day...   
Waiting..   
  
  
Two weeks later   
  


"Ohaiyo Usa-chan!" Rei called, wondering what type of mood her friend would be in today. Over the past couple of weeks Usagi had become more and more irritable, not to mention restless. Rei was also finding visiting Usagi to be a lot less fun, as Usagi seemed to watch people move with envy and desire written clearly on her face. Not only that but, everything that used to be important to her now seemed not to matter, and Rei was really beginning to wonder why.   
Ami and Minako had also noticed the change; the way Usagi no longer seemed excited about the little things that used to thrill her, like Pizza Hut pizza, or a beautiful sunset. Her thoughts had become more morbid, causing them to worry. Usagi had always been full of life, and everyone had always thought she would be able to hold out and remain strong, no matter what the circumstance may be.   
"Hi Rei." said Usagi, watching as her raven-haired friend walked towards the window; her long, tanned legs clearly showing from beneath a short red skirt.   
"So how've you been Usa-chan?" Ami asked, concern showing clearly in her aqua eyes.   
"Oh, not too bad....just wasting away, getting paler and pastier. Pretty soon I think even bleached sheets will have some competition for the title "White As It Gets" "   
Minako managed a strangled a laugh and said "Well, you're leaving for that cherry tree place tomorrow. Soon you'll be back on your feet and out in the sun.."   
"Yeah, if I can actually walk on these things" stated Usagi.   
Changing the subject, Ami said, "Seiya said to tell you he'd be by around 12:00."   
"Really?" asked Usagi, seeming to perk up a bit "I can't wait!"   
The girls sighed. This was a clear indicator that Usagi was feeling okay.   
"Well, why don't I get us something to drink?" stated Minako. "I don't know about you guys, but I'm as thirsty as a log on a hot day!"   
Everyone sweat dropped, and Ami didn't even bother to correct her, she just led her out the door.   
Stepping away from the window, Rei sat on the edge of the bed, trying to think of what would be the best way to explain why Seiya was coming.   
Seeing Rei's expression darken, Usagi cringed inwardly, wondering what had happened. Rei's fiery eyes focused on Usagi and she began.   
"Usa, there's something you have to know before Seiya comes. He wanted me to tell you because he's a cowardly louse."   
"What?" asked Usagi, not completely sure that she wanted the answer.   
"Well...Seiya isn't the guy you thought he was, Usa. He's...seeing other women. Particularly Janice."   
"He's...dating her?" asked Usagi, her voice devoid of emotion.   
"Well, that's one way to put it. They were seeing each other even before the incident."   
"That *whore*!!"   
"You know Janice, she's had feelings for Seiya for a long time. And when he looked interested, she invited him. It's not entirely her fault, Seiya accepted the invitation."   
"That bastard!" Usagi muttered under her breath. "I can't believe him."   
"Well, he'll be here any minute. Don't do anything rash... although I wouldn't blame you if you killed him."   
"Rei!" Usagi exclaimed with a laugh, watching her friend exit. Seiya entered soon after.   
"Hey Odango." He greeted her with a box of chocolates in hand and a cheerful smile on his face.   
"Ohaiyo Seiya...what did you want to talk to me about?"   
"Usagi, please understand. This isn't because of your legs or anything, I was going do this anyways, but-" Usagi interrupted abruptly.   
"Just say it, Rei warned me."   
"She did?"   
"She had the guts to do what you wouldn't."   
"Oh. Well, then I guess you know that I'm interested in Janice. We're going out now."   
"And you were cheating on me with her before." Usagi said bitterly.   
Seiya said nothing, he just sat there looking guilty.   
"Get out." whispered Usagi. "I don't want to see you…ever again." she finished in a strangled tone, her throat constricting painfully.   
"Usagi....I'll always care about you. You really-"   
"Shut up!" Usagi raged. "Just...get the hell out of here!"   
Then Rei appeared at the door, glaring daggers at him "You heard her, GET OUT!"   
Seiya didn't need to be told again, and with Rei's disapproving eyes on him, he slowly left the room.   
'That's it,' Usagi thought to herself. 'Tonight I take what I have. It should be enough.'   
As Rei re-entered the room and walked to the window, Usagi thought   
'Besides, I'll never be able to walk again. I'm useless and wheel chair bound. I might as well go now, before I go to Cherry Tree.'   
"Usagi?" questioned Rei. Her eyes focusing on the tears streaming from her friends eyes. "Are you okay?"   
Usagi, still deep in thought, ignored her friend. Then, realising Rei had asked her something, she smiled.   
"Could you brush my hair?"   
"Sure." Smiled Rei, reaching into the drawer to feel around for Usagi's brush.   
For a moment, Usagi sat tense, wondering if her friends questioning hand would find the crumpled piece of Kleenex stuffed into the back corner.   
"PIZZA!" yelled Shingo, startling Rei. And as she jumped in shock, the drawer of the dresser fell out to the floor, scattering its contents everywhere. With the pills fortunately landing within their tissue, still hidden.   
"Shingo!" exclaimed Usagi, watching Rei replace the contents of the drawer and sighed as she picked up the tissue by the corners.   
"Hey Sis," Shingo said, moving towards the bed with the pizza box in his arms...then, tripping over a loose shoelace, he fell, bumping into Rei. She dropped the tissue, which opened like a flower, revealing the stash of rose-coloured pills within.   
Rei's amethyst eyes flew open in surprise as they met Usagi's. Then, biting back a comment, she quickly pulled back up the corners of the tissue and turned to Shingo. Struggling to contain her disgust, she marched into the bathroom, calling after herself,   
"Shingo, could you go and get us a couple of sodas from the lobby?"   
"Sure!" he replied, running back out of the room.   
After he left, the sound of a toilet flushing came from the bathroom. Rei soon emerged, shaking with rage, and she turned her full attention on her blonde friend.   
"What were those?!?"   
"Painkillers." Usagi stated calmly.   
"What were they doing in your drawer? You weren't actually planning on taking them, were you?"   
"And what if I was?" Usagi shot back, making her friend blink in surprise.   
"Usagi, come on! You are going to get better!"   
"That's what everyone always says… You'll get better." But what do you know?" Usagi demanded, tears beginning to form in her eyes as she tried to explain.   
"You have two good, strong legs, and no idea as to what I'm going through. What if you're wrong? What if I can't walk?"   
"Maybe I don't know what you're going through," Rei replied firmly. "But I was here! I heard your mom-do you know she cried, non- stop, and prayed for hours?? You weren't there, you didn't have to listen to her crying, "God, please don't take my baby!" Christ, Usa!!! We've been friends for ages, and this is one thing I never thought I'd live to see you do. Suicide?"   
"Rei, please..I can't live in a wheel chair forever. I don't think I could handle it. I'm not as strong as everyone thinks I am."   
"Usagi, you aren't going to..."   
"Please Rei, I probably never would have taken them, but I needed the option. I needed to have the choice, to know that I wasn't totally helpless."   
"That is the most selfish thing I've ever heard come out of your mouth!" Rei stated.   
"Even terminally ill patients have the right to end their own lives."   
"Usa, you're not terminally ill, you're strong and healthy. Your legs will get better!" said Rei, opening her skirt to reveal the pills.   
"Rei?" Asked Usagi, bewildered.   
"You're right. You have to decide if you want to kill yourself or not. If you're really determined, I know that just flushing a few pills won't really help. But if you do, I'll never forgive you for the pain that you'll cause your mom and dad, Ami, Minako,...everyone, and me. Usagi, you're almost like a sister." Stated Rei, tears threatening to spill from her eyes as she looked into the innocent eyes of her friend, unshed tears sparkling like stars within them.   
"Rei-chan, I don't think I could have done it anyway."   
Rei smiled wryly. "Promise me that when I put these back, you won't take them until you've given Cherry Tree, and phsyio, a try."   
"Rei," started Usagi. "You know I hate to be a coward." She gave her friend a slightly watery smile.   
Rei smiled largely then, and gave Usagi a hug before rushing to flush the pills just as Shingo came back into the room followed by Ami and Minako.   
"So, what did we miss?" Minako asked.   
Rei and Usagi just looked at each other before Usagi said, "I'll miss you guys so much when I go to Cherry Hollow tomorrow!"   
"Aw, we'll visit you." promised Ami, smiling at Usagi.   
"I know." Usagi said, catching their eyes.   
  
Usagi's friends were not coming the following day, Usagi was moving out to Cherry Tree.   
Early that morning, around 9:00 am, Usagi's parents arrived to help her pack all her things, and to sign the discharge papers.   
By 9:30 Usagi was on her way, being wheeled out the door by her dad. As she passed by, many of the hospital staff waved farewell, and wished her the best on her road to recovery.   
Down the elevator and out the door went Usagi, enduring the stares of curious people as she went by.   
Finally they reached the car, and everything seemed to be going well.   
As the car began to move, an eerie feeling overcame Usagi, smothering her with a darkness that was almost unbearable.   
FLASH!! A car skidding on a wet road, headlights hitting the windshield...Usagi's breathing accelerated...she was confined...   
"STOP!" she yelled, panic setting in. "I have to get out…Let me out!!"   
"But...we just started." her dad stated calmly, wondering what could be wrong.   
"Let me out!" Usagi responded, frantically pounding at the window.   
"Shh, shh. It's okay, you're fine...I have something for you.." Her mother comforted her as her father pulled the car over.   
"I should have given this to you before," said Usagi's mother, handing her a pill and a bottle of water. "It'll help" she soothed as Usagi swallowed the pill.   
Soon the tranquilizer did its job, and Usagi felt herself slip into an uncaring daze, calming down as sleep overcame her.   
  
When Usagi awoke, she was greeted with the site of a large black and white sign with pink cherry blossoms on the corner reading,   
"Welcome to Cherry Tree Hollow Rehabilitation Center"   
'As if they needed a sign…' Usagi thought, looking out the window. The large expanse of green dotted with people manuvering wheel chairs down over wide paths that all led up to a large white building surrounded by blossoming pink cherry trees.   
"We're here." Stated Usagi's mother as the car pulled up in front of the large double doors.   
"Well, here I go. No turning back now." Usagi stated as her father wheeled her through the doors and into the large lobby.   
"Hi!" said a young voice, and as Usagi turned her head towards the sound, she was greeted by the sight of....   
  
  


Authors note….. 

Hey everyone…. I'll put ch. 4 out b4 I go away on vacation… and then I'll try and write the next part while I'm gone… kk? No promises …..

tyl 

sugar 


	4. ch4

Sorry….. no poem thin… today…. Gota get this up up up!!!

Part 4

"Hi!" said a young voice, and as Usagi turned her head towards the sound. She was greeted by the sight of slim brown haired girl with bright green eyes sitting in a wheel chair. "Are you Usagi?" she asked

"Uh…yes…." Stated Usagi confused that this strange girl would know her name. 

"Finally! I've been waiting for hours… I'm Makoto by the way…. Your room mate." 

"Oh… hi… nice to meet you" stated Usagi as Makoto wheeled over so that she could shake Usagi's hand. 

"Those your folks?" Makoto questioned pointing over at Usagi's parents where they stood at the front desk 

"Yes…" 

"Ok… Mr. and Mrs. Tuskanio!" she called. Usagi's mom turned around and smiled at her. 

"I'm going to show Usagi our room and I was wondering if you'd like to come along?" stated Makoto 

"Oh! Ok… "Replied Usagi's mother, pushing Usagi after Makoto as she led the way down a long hall way and into the elevators. 

Usagi followed Makoto down another long hallway to a door right at the end, 

"Best room in the house" Mako teased as she opened the door revealing a pale blue room with a nice view of the gardens below….. 

"Oh! Usagi just look at the view….. It's so pretty!" exclaimed her mother looking out the window

"Yeah mom….. Gorgeous" Usagi agreed half-mindedly staring at the strange contraption rigged over the bed…. "Mom…. Could you go and get some of my stuff?" questioned Usagi…wanting some private time with her new room mate. 

"Sure hunny…. I'll be back in a flash!" Stated Ikaku (how the heck do you spell this?) and after waving at Mako ran out back down the hall to the elevator…. 

"So… what's it like here?" Usagi asked 

"Well….. It's…." Was as far as Makoto got before a tall brown haired green eyed man wheeled into the room 

"Mako-Chan… look!!" he exclaimed as he wheeled into the room.

"Hi Kevin….. Can it wait? I'm in the middle of something"

Turning Kevin saw Usagi and a rosy blush crept up his cheeks…. "Gomen" he mumbled…. Then slowly he lifted himself out of his wheelchair and stood on his own two feet for two seconds before collapsing back down…. 

"Two seconds Mako….. Two whole seconds!" he exclaimed

"That's excellent!" exclaimed Makoto wheeling closer to him…..then to Usagi's complete amazement she kissed him deeply on the lips….. When they had finished Makoto turned towards Usagi flushing, 

"Usagi…. This is Kevin… my boyfriend… Kevin this is Usagi…. My new roommate"

"Hello" Kevin said offering a hand for Usagi to shake, 

"Nice to meet you" Usagi responded with a smile….. 

"Oh….. A new recruit…." A voice from the door sneered… drawing the group's attention to the young man in the doorway…. "Well…… aren't you going to introduce us?" he asked

As everyone stared at him….Makoto said, 

"Usagi…. That is Mamoru..." 

"Mamoru…. This is Usagi… my new room mate" 

They stared at each other…. Silently appraising one another, Usagi taking in his unruly raven hair, piercing midnight eyes, handsome face, and strong frame…. 'He's cute…' she thought to herself as the man wheeled over….. 

"You have the funniest hairstyle I've ever seen…." Mamoru commented reaching out his hand to pull one of her long streamers towards him. 

"and you have the worst manners…." Usagi shot back pulling her hair out of his hands, feeling slightly offended. Turning her attention back to Makoto she said, "don't people know how to knock around here?"

"some do…. some don't" Makoto responded, then turning to Kevin, she told him she'd see him at dinner… then Kevin and Mamoru both left the room…. Mamoru stopping at the door to look back at the blonde girl, thinking, 'I wonder how she got here….' Before the memories of his own accident drifted over him… forcing him to pause to regain his cool outer mask before wheeling off down the hall… to his room… 

Usagi's family stayed the whole day, her mother unpacking and arranging her things, including her large collection of Manga's. When visiting hours drew to an end around 5 o'clock her family said good-bye promising to visit her the following week-end.  

 Turning to her room mate she saw that Makoto had drifted off into a world of her own…. 

"mako-chan?" she asked wheeling over, noticing the tears that had begun to stream down her new room-mates face. 

"its nothing….." Mako said trying to smile through her tears… 

Turning Usagi said, "….. are you sure… do you want to tell me about it?" 

"NO!" Mako stated with such vivid finality that Usagi recoiled in shock…. 

"gomen, I was only trying to help" she whispered wheeling back to her side of the room and picking up her latest Gundam wing doujin. (I'm a huge GW fan :D) around half an hour later Usagi was finished, and smiling to herself she placed it back on the shelf, ready to re-read her mint na bokura, when Makoto's voice came from across the room. 

"I'm sorry about early, its just that its been a while since my father visited me, and when he does he hardly ever looks at me.." 

not knowing what to say Usagi wheeled across the room, and put her arms around her room mate as Makoto started to cry.

"shh its ok… its ok… don't cry" Usagi whispered holding the sobbing girl. after a couple of minuets Makoto's tears ceased and she sat up drying her eyes just as Kevin appeared in the door way. One look at her red rimmed eyes and he was at her side. 

"It's ok Mako. Don't worry about it… he just feels guilty that's why… " 

"I know kev. But it hurts, it hurts sooo much" 

"shh… I'm here for you… I'll always be here for you"

"don't say that .. you'll go home too one day… and me…I'll be stuck here forever" 

"not forever.. I'll visit you and then we'll get married" 

"oh kev. Your just saying that" Makoto stated half heartedly as she looked at him

Kevin just grinned and stated "would you lovely ladies allow me to escort you to dinner?" 

Usagi's stomach growled loudly, and everyone laughed… "well I guess my stomach has no complaints" she commented and the trio left the room for the elevators.

15mins later the group wheeled into the cafeteria, Makoto, and Kevin steering for a table by the windows occupied by another boy the Usagi didn't know and to her surprise Mamoru. 

"Hey Calvin" Kevin greeted the stranger as he wheeled up to park his chair across from his.

"Hey guys, who's Blondie?" he questioned looking straight at Usagi. 

"Blondie?" Usagi asked herself. As Mamoru spoke up

"that Odango head is Makoto's new room mate" 

"oh.." Calvin mouthed 

"yes.. And my names Usagi… Usa...gee… not Odango!" 

"sorry Odango" mamoru jeered

"jerk" Usagi muttered, causing the other three to laugh while mamoru glared darkly at her. 

Ignoring him Usagi focused her attention on the bowl of chicken noodle soup that was placed in front of her, and began devouring it. 

"Hmm looks like we are going to have to keep our eyes on our food around this one" Mamoru commented as Usagi finished her soup and turned to gobble up her grilled cheese sandwich. 

"what? I'm hungry" Usagi stated innocently. 

"So Calvin how's your sister doing?" Makoto asked him trying to fend of an argument

"Oh… She's fine…" Calvin responded distractedly as Usagi continued to gobble down her dinner much to Mamoru's amusement

"Yoooo hoooo Calvin over here!" Makoto called trying to get his attention as Usagi slurped up the last of her sandwich and smiled sweetly at him causing a bright red blush to form on his cheeks. 

"Does someone have a crush?" Kevin teased his friend making him blush even redder

".....no….." Calvin stated

Usagi smiled Calvin was cute, and she actually didn't mind if he had a crush on her so making up her mind she asked him, 

"Hey Calvin, do you think you could help me eat this cake?"

Unknown to Usagi, Mamoru's eyes had narrowed slightly at Calvin in a silent warning as if to say, "Back off she's mine"

Calvin gulped, being on of the few people to know how Mamoru really ended up in "Cherry" and turning to Usagi quickly stated, 

"I'm sorry I've gota go… nice meeting you though" and saying goodbye to Kevin and Makoto wheeled out leaving a dazed Usagi behind wondering what that was all about, and Mamoru satisfied that no one would bother the Odango brain.

Oy… off to Banff BC tomorrow to see the glaciers…. So I'll skedaddle and talk to you all in about 3weeks 

Hope you like it, and review please…. So I have something to look foreword too when I get back. 

Ttyl

Sugar 


	5. 5

HEY! I made it back! Yes… I know I'm slow slow slow… but it coudlnt' be helped I had a great deal of WB! But I got the idea tap on… so I'll be writing whenever I have the time. 

Walk to my lovers arms.

By Sugargurl

Salty streams flow down petal cheeks

White fire racing up my legs

Pain washes over me

Stop, Don't 

Every touch unwanted, yet necessary torture

Part 5

The next morning Usagi woke up and immediately tried to sit up, earning her a bolt of pain from each of her legs. 

"Ouch!" she muttered as she fell back into the mattress, having bitterly resigned to the fact that she was stuck in bed. Sighing Usagi looked around, immediately taking in the site of Makoto's vacated bed, and missing wheel chair.  Busy wondering where her room mate could be, Usagi didn't hear the woman until she stated,

"good morning Usagi, I'm Sophie." Stepping into the room. Usagi turned her head to watch the woman, as she continued, "I'm here to teach you how to use the pulley, so that you'll be able to get yourself out of bed." That said the nurse showed her how to lower the pulley until she could just reach the ring; then how to pull herself up, and over into the chair. 

Grinning with pleasure at her accomplishment the nurse waited while Usagi wheeled into the bathroom, before instructing her that her Physio sessions started at 10 o'clock. 

Slightly excited, Usagi wheeled off down the hall deep in thought over what the day would bring. 

"HEY! USA!" Makoto called as Usagi entered the mess room. 

"hey!" Usagi replied wheeling over to the table.  "hi Kevin, Calvin sleep well?" she continued once she'd pulled up. 

"yea… slept ok" Calvin responded

"soo you have your 1st session today right?" Kevin asked

"yes, is there anything I should know?" Usagi asked excitedly

"yes… it'll hurt" Calvin stated 

"oh…" Usa sighed frowning 

"it'll more than hurt" a voice called from behind her, "It'll feel like your legs are going to fall right off, they pull them, massage them, and stretch them until you scream from the pain, and only then do they let up a bit" 

"shut up mamoru, you're going to scare her." Calvin ordered 

"well, why shouldn't I say something Calvin, it's the truth."   Mamoru sneered settling himself across the table from Usagi. "Sleep well Odango?" 

Glaring at him Usagi ignored the question, taking a bite of her muffin instead; before turning to ask, 

"Makoto, do you think you could show me where to go?" 

"uh… sorry" Makoto answered "I actually have to be somewhere before then…" 

Usagi's shoulders slumped, how was she supposed to get there? a few moments later the silence was broken as,

 Calvin spoke up, "I'll take you"

"really?" Usagi gushed, taking no notice of the frown on Mamoru's face right before he muttered, 

"see you later losers" none too quietly

sighing slightly too herself, Usagi watched him go, wondering just what the hell was his problem, and as her other friends wheeled off she vowed to ask Makoto about it later. 

Usagi waited alone, as Calvin had wheeled off shortly after showing her where to go, but that had been at least five minuets ago. Sighing Usa looked down the long impersonal hallway, bored out of her mind, and completely sick of the supposedly soothing colour, tope. Finally a door to her left opened and a slender man stepped into the hall, 

"Tuskanio, Usagi?" he asked causing Usagi to turn in her wheel chair to face him. 

"yes" 

"hello, sorry to keep you waiting. I'm Dr. Kerr…" the man stated moving aside to allow her to wheel into the room. 

Usagi entered the room, glancing about her at the numerous charts, and large posters displaying various muscle groups in the human body. 

Finally her glance settled on the large, surprisingly low doctors table in one corner of the room, and wheeling over to it, she reached up grabbing the metal ring to hoist herself onto the table.

"ok Usagi, today I'm going to go easy on you, just a bit of stretching, to see what kind of shape your legs are in." 

Usagi nodded glumly, bracing herself against the pain as he reached out to touch her leg. Pain flashed through the limb, causing Usagi to gasp, as she desperately tried to fight off tears. How would she bear it when he actually began the exercises if she couldn't even stand a simple touch? 

"It 's ok, Usagi… the pain will lessen in time." Dr. Kerr tried to sooth. She didn't respond, forcing herself to think of something else, anything but the white hot sensations racing through her useless limbs. 

"oh god, oh god.." she muttered as he squeezed her muscles checking to see how they had healed… (1)

the torture went on and on, and although the clock showed the passage of only 20mins, it had felt like hours. Hours of endless torture, as unused muscles were pulled, stretched, and manouvered. At the end of it Usagi's legs throbbed in pain, her palms bore small cuts where she had clenched her fists in order to prevent herself from crying out, and her usually clear blue eyes, were red rimmed from crying. 

"all done" Dr. Kerr stated releasing his grip upon Usagi's tortured limbs. "how about you go soak your legs in the hot pool, it might help them to feel better" 

tentatively Usagi nodded her head, settling back into her wheel chair, "will there be anyone else there?" she questioned

"yes…" 

Usagi blanched… there was no way that she would go now. Not with her legs mutilated the way they were.

"never mind then… I forgot I had to meet up with someone." 

"Usagi…" the doctor said, "I really think you should go" 

eyes flashing defiantly she wheeled past him, towards the door, "I am not going!' she called back racing off down the hall, trying hard not to steer into anything in her haste to return to the safety of her room. 

It had been about an hour since the "torture session" as Usagi had dubbed her meeting with Dr. Kerr, and Usagi as now staring out the window of her room deep in thought. She idly watched as people steered down the paved paths towards the gardens. She was so deep in her thoughts she didn't hear his approach, instead she sensed him, and turned her head to her left taking in his strong profile as he sat in his wheel chair beside her. 

The silence stretched on until Mamoru finally spoke,

"we're having a meeting on the roof top tonight"

Usagi was shocked, and she remained silent, gaping at him open mouthed. 

Mamrou raised an eye brow in question, "Odango, close your mouth, your tongue's getting dusty."

Usagi glared at him, "well… then don't shock me like that… I thought you'd had a brain transplant or something" 

"no… no transplant…" Mamoru stated teasingly, "so are you coming?"

"depends who else is going" 

"makoto, and Kevin… that's it"

"well… then I guess I'll come" 

Mamoru nodded in understanding, and they fell into silence once more, Usagi looking out the window, and mamoru pretending to look out the window while sneaking peeks at the blonde haired girl.  

Sighing to himself, Mamoru backed up, and as he wheeled out the door called "I'll c you later…" 

"close the door would you?" Usagi answered back not turning to see the small, yet sincere smile directed at her. 

Out of the room, and with the door between them, mamoru shook his head at his thoughts. He would be happy for now, and maybe just maybe Usagi would love him… for a little while at least; because if his secret ever got he was positive Usagi would run, and he wouldn't blame her. After all he was cursed. 

TBC… 

ominous neh?  

If u want to be notified of updates e-mail me at sugargurl01x02@hotmail.com 


	6. ch6

Hi everyone,  this is a long chapter! (long for me) so please please please review *begs* 

Well I hope you like it and I'll c u all later

Walk to my Lovers Arms

By Sugargurl

Chapter 6

Hearing the door close quietly behind her, Usagi looked about the room, with a sigh she settled back into her chair exhausted from that mornings exercise. Wheeling over to her bed, she pulled herself up, and lay back upon the sheets before closing her eyes for a short nap. Unfortunately it was not to be, as no sooner than she'd closed her eyes the door creaked open. 

Some time later Makoto entered the room and watched as her room mate slumbered peacefully. Silently she wheeled over to Usagi's side of the room, to look longingly at the many pictures of Usagi and her friends. Heaving a sigh, Makoto wheeled back to her side, and slipping a chain from about her neck unlocked a wooden box where she proceeded to pull out a slender photo album.

"you said you would always be there" she whispered softly to the pictures inside as she turned the pages, each smiling face, a reminder of what she had. Her at a birthday party, her on a motorcycle… and always, always surrounded by friends.

"look at me now, oh god guys just look what happened" she whispered as tears leaked from emerald eyes, her throat choked as she kept herself from crying, 

"boys don't cry" she whispered to herself and with a little laugh turned yet another page in her album "too bad, I'm not a boy"   

Usagi opened her eyes, hearing strangled sobs, and a low keening. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes she pulled herself up, startled as she realized it was Makoto who was making the pitiful sound. 

"Mako?" she questioned as she slipped into her chair. "you ok?" 

Makoto ignored her, lost in her own memories, as she turned each page, faster, more frantically. 

Not knowing what else to do, Usagi wheeled over gently wrapping an arm about her sobbing room mate, and as Makoto turned to bury her nose in Usagi's shoulders, Usagi murmured,

"you want to talk about it?" even as she soothingly stroked Mako's chestnut tresses.

   Makoto didn't reply, just continued cry, until she had no tears left, before finally pulling back and whispering, 

"I'll be ok now… just, I'm never going to be able to do any of these things again… and well my dad hardly ever comes to visit me anymore. He feels that he's responsible for my accident, but how could he know that was going to happen… how could he know?" Makoto whispered, her slender frame rocking back and forth. 

"and now… I'm never going to get married… never have kids, I'll be trapped here forever… forever and ever stuck in a chair" she continued, eyes completely devoid of emotion as they looked about her. Usagi shuddered, never before had she seen such a blank look, and oh god would she give anything to have someone enter the room right then, but unfortunately no one came, and Makoto continued her strange chant too far gone into herself to realize just what she was muttering about. 

A knock sounded on the door, and then opened as Kevin wheeled in, his grin dying on his lips as his eyes alighted upon Makoto's clearly shaken form 

"what happened?" he demanded facing Usagi

"I don't know… I woke up and she was already clutching that book…" 

Kevin glanced to where Usagi had pointed, the lines of puzzlement smoothing out of his forehead as realization dawned. 

"oh…" he mouthed stepping gingerly towards his girl friend. 

"Makoto…." He began hand reaching under her chin to tilt it upwards so that he could look into her deep emerald eyes

"... alone… so lonely" she muttered eyes still focused on some inner horror

"Mako-Chan… please snap out of it… everything's going to be fine" Kevin whispered, his thumb stroking down her cheek, as he pulled her as close as he could to himself, "Shh baby, I'm here for you"

Usagi looked on, slightly jealous of what they had, for it was painfully obvious that Kevin would do anything for Makoto… 

"Kevin… promise you'll stay with me" Makoto finally whispered coming back to herself as she clung tighter to her boy friend, knuckles white. 

"Shh… I'm here, and I'm not leaving" Kevin promised. 

Embarrassed at the scene before her Usagi wheeled out of the room, and down the hall towards the dining room, puzzling over what she had learned. 

Makoto was no where near as strong as Usagi had thought, in fact the opposite was true. Makoto was probably weaker, as it seemed the other girl had lost a lot more than the use of her legs. 

"hey Odango… you're blocking the door" Mamoru's familiar sneer interrupted her thoughts. Usagi denied him an answer, opting instead to wheel straight to their table. 

"hi guys" she greeted Calvin, and the other people already seated around the table. 

"hey, where's Makoto and Kevin?" Calvin asked

Usagi didn't know what to say, and looked around the table imploringly. To her complete surprise it was Mamoru who came to her rescue

"probably making out or something.. You know those two, can't keep their hands off each other." 

Calvin grinned wryly, "Yeah… here they come now!" 

Usagi turned to face the door, and smiled to herself as she watched them wheel in. Makoto was smiling bravely and her eyes although slightly red, were dry.

"Hey you guys!" Calvin called out, "took you long enough"

Kevin glanced at mamoru for some type of hint, 

"sooo Kevin… how long can you hold your breath for now?" he asked with a wink. 

Usagi watched as Makoto smiled at him

"hmm… a pretty long time I'd say" she stated parking beside Usagi

Calvin laughed before turning his attention back to his dinner. 

For a while they just sat in silence eating. Then Calvin left, and conversation picked up again. 

"we're still on for later right?" Mamoru asked looking from Kevin to Makoto

Mako nodded, "of course…" 

"k, I'll c you then" he stated wheeling away.

"You ok Mako?" Usagi questioned turning to her room mate

"yeah… I'm fine now. Sorry about earlier, I saw the shrink today, and well…some days are better than others." She replied smiling. They sunk once more into silence, then Kevin spoke up

"so how was your first session" 

Usagi shuddered, "awful, it hurt a lot… and Dr. Kerr actually wanted me to go swimming!"

Makoto smiled, "yea… the swimming thing took me a while, but oh does it ever feel good" 

Kevin laughed at the disbelieving look on Usagi's face, "true.. it really does feel good…" 

"why would that feel good… when every touch burns? I just don't get it" 

both her table mates laughed at her logic, but stopped abruptly as Usagi questioned, 

"guys… what's the deal with Mamoru?" 

they shared a look, before Kevin stated, "he's been here a while… but no one really knows much about what happened to him. Just that he doesn't really participate in treatment…"

"… its as if he doesn't want to get better" Makoto remarked

"yea… and the thing is, that he could easily have a full recovery too…"

"… other than that… you'd have to ask him about…" 

Usagi looked from one to the other, and saw that they honestly didn't know any more, 

"well…. We have some time to kill… want to go watch Small Ville?" 

The couple nodded in agreement, and the trio left for the entertainment room. 

Later that night Usagi and Makoto wheeled back to their room. Usagi at a complete loss, as she thought they were going out. 

She opened her mouth in protest, but was silenced by Makoto who placed a finger to her lips, 

"don't worry… we're still going" she whispered closing the door behind them "just get into bed as usual, but leave your clothes on. 

Still puzzled, Usagi did as she was told, and just waited eyes wide open for some type of sign. 

Twenty minuets later the door opened, and the light was turned off by a nurse. Makoto lay still on the other side of the room, and still Usagi waited in silence eyes fixed to the clock which read 11:00. 

"ok… be quiet" Mako hissed, pulling herself into her wheel chair, and waited for Usagi to do the same. 

Together they wheeled over to the door, cracking it open to peek down the hall way. 

"coast is clear" Mako breathed, taking off down the hall, Usagi hot on her heels. 

Into the elevator they went, Makoto hitting the up button, which would take them to the roof. 

The doors dinged open, and the pair wheeled out, Usagi following as Makoto went down the path through the roof top garden. 

"we usually meet by the gazebo" Makoto stated by way of explanation.

Usagi nodded, smiling as she spotted the boys up ahead. 

"hey girls, I see you made it!" Kevin called. 

"you bet you, I wouldn't miss it for the world" Mako stated back smiling gleefully as Mamoru, held up a bottle. 

"I brought the drinks" he stated 

"and I have the glasses" Kevin remarked, 

"yup… and we have the beauty" Usagi laughed gaily taking the proffered cup of juice from the pair. 

The small group sat silently sipping their grape juice, 

"its beautifull up here" Usagi sighed, staring at the stars. 

"mmm you bet" Mako agreed tugging at Kevin's arm "come on Kev. Tell us a story" 

Usagi looked over at him, "a story?" 

Kevin smiled, "which one Mako-chan.." 

"tell me about the moon" she whispered gazing at the huge glowing sphere, as it shone down upon them. 

"that ones Mamoru's to tell… it is his book after all" 

"yeah.. but he never tells it.." Makoto pouted 

Usagi watched the exchange, wondering what they were talking about, 

"come on Mamoru, tell her about it.."

"no" he stated calmly

"please" Mako pleaded

"no… I don't want to" 

her curiosity now fully piped Usagi joined in,

"please Mamoru, tell us… I would like to know" 

Mamoru looked at her, and sighed "no" he muttered 

"please" Usagi requested again, pouting slightly. 

Mamoru looked at her again, 'she's too beautiful' he thought and sighed, 

"The legend goes, that at one time the earth was not the only planet people lived on. Mercury, Venus, Mercury, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto, all were inhabited, and each planet was ruled by a royal family, sworn to protect the leader of this alliance. There on the silver moon, lived the most powerful warriors, their power drawn from the pureness and goodness in their very hearts, and they used it to keep evil at bay. At a time when the Earth was just joining into this alliance, the earth prince, Endmyion, and the moon queen Selenity's daughter, Serenity fell in love. But it was not to be, as an evil sorceress named Beryl began to conquer the outer planets, her dark power gaining in strength as she moved inwards, attacking and finally conquering the earth before setting her sites on the source off all power with in the solar system. She went to the moon on the day of Serenity's 18th birthday, and attacked. The prince fought bravely not wanting his love to be harmed, but it was all in vain. Beryl was too powerful, and ended up killing him, and as for Serenity she refused to be separated from him, and followed him to his death. 

The moon kingdom was in ruins, Queen Selenity was heart broken over the death of her daughter and her kingdom, and vowed to ride the world of Beryl once and for all. Taking the silver imperium crystal she held it too her heart, and poured her entire life force into ridding the world of evil, and to ensure that her beloved daughter, and her guardians would have a second chance at life, along with Endmyion the earth prince. Then she passes away… leaving the future of the moon kingdom in her daughter's hands." Mamoru finished looking up, noticing that Mako and Kevin had wheeled off during his story. Then he glanced at Usagi, as she wiped the tears from her eyes

"thank you…" she murmured reaching out to hold his hand. 

"its nothing" mamoru whispered back, pushing a loose strand of hair back behind her ear. 

"so are you really writing a book?" she asked

"I was… before the accident…"

"oh…" Usagi mouthed

"but I just haven't had the heart to since my mother died, she was the one encouraging me to write it out…" mamoru whispered looking down to hide his tears. 

"I think you should finish it…" Usagi stated, stroking the back of his hand.

"yea.. but I never will… and it won't matter because I'm never going to get out of this place" 

"sure you will… you could probably walk out of here anytime you wanted" Usagi insisted

"I won't… I can't… I can't let anyone else die because of me…" mamoru muttered

Usagi looked on puzzled, 

"… I don't think you should worry about that happening" 

"how would you know!" mamoru spat out "so many people have already died because of me… I'm not worth loving, and I doubt any one ever will…" 

"don't say that!" 

"yea.. but its true.. my girlfriend dumped me, after the accident, and my friends never visit any more… I'm worth less, useless…." Mamoru trailed off looking away

"don't say that" Usagi implored reaching out to him, "look at me, I am alive, my boy friend dumped me too, after the accident…" 

"he was an idiot.." 

"what?" Usagi demanded shocked

"he was an idiot to dump you…" 

Usagi stared at him dumb founded, as he took her hand, and brought it to his lips, 

"he was an idiot to let such a beauty go" Mamoru clarified wheeling away as fast as he could, calling over his shoulder, "although you really are an Odango brain!" 

Usagi stared after him in shock… 'What just happened?' she questioned, then shook her head as if to clear it. 

"come on Usagi… lets go in" Makoto stated, 

Usagi nodded dumbly, still lost in thought as she followed Makoto back to their room, and then got into bed

Her last thought before sleep washed over her,

'could he like me?'

PLEASE REVIEW

Authors Note: soo what did u think? Hmm?? Not as much romance on the usaxmamo front as I would have liked in this chapter… but its ok… I got the next one all planned… eek! Some ones making a re-appearance!

If you want to be notified of updates let me know: sugargurl01x02@hotmail.com is where to find me!

C ya round

Sugar


	7. ch7

Hello Everyone, 

Been ages I know… but here we go! And the next part is coming! ^_^ ahh the joys of renewed inspiration. 

****

****

**Walk To My Lovers Arms**

Heart torn asunder, 

Mind unsure what to do

I sit silently, thinking

Tears spilling unheeded

As my heart slowly heals

Accepting the truth

Part 6

Usagi woke up, with fire burning through her legs, and her thoughts still in turmoil over what had transpire the night before between her and Mamoru. Hearing a faint creaking of the door opening and thinking it to be Kevin she calmly stated, 

"No Kevin, Mako is not here, and no I don't want to come down for breakfast"

"Who's Kevin?" the door-openers voice stated calmly 

Usagi's eyes flew open at the sound of the once familiar voice she turned her head towards him. Eyes, first widening, she'd forgotten how handsome he was, and as she remembered that he was the reason she was there they darkened at his brashness. 

"You actually dared to come here?" she hissed

"Yea… Usagi… there's something I need to talk to you about" Seiya whispered his eyes pleading with her to listen to him. 

"What?" Usagi demanded, then seeing that he was about to speak again she lashed out, "I'm not going to forgive you for what you did to me."

Seiya sat still, eyes wide as he stared at her, "please Odango, I never meant…" he paused looking into her flaming eyes "Usagi, please, I'm so sorry about the party, she means nothing to me… nothing"

Usagi stared at him for a moment, reading his face, before laughing bitterly,

"You think that matters to me??" Usagi dead panned as she manoeuvred into her wheel chair, wheeling herself towards the window.

"Usagi… I know it doesn't change anything, but it's true… she isn't anything compared to you" 

Once again Usagi laughed bitterly, turning slightly in her chair to gaze at him. Straining with the effort to suppress her tears, 

"Please…odango let me speak..." Seiya pleaded again, 

Usagi remained silent for a moment, then spoke, her voice venomous, "speak then, if it will get you gone" 

Seiya shuddered a little at her tone, for he'd never heard her speak thus, and taking a breath he began, 

"Usagi, I wanted to say, I deeply regret everything that has happened to you. I wanted you to know, that I loved you at the party, I love you now, and I will keep on loving you. I will never ever forgive myself for what happened to you. I ruined my chances of happiness, and I guess I'll have to face the consequence, knowing that you will hate me for my entire life." He paused then, reaching out to brush his fingertips lightly over her for-arm as he went on, "I will always hold a special place in my heart for you Usagi, you were my first love… " he trailed off as her hardened blue eyes rose to meet his, 

"Go away" she stated her voice rising in fever as she branded him with her words "once I thought I loved you, but now, I don't care if you die and rot in the street." With that she wretched her arm away, and would look at him no more, despite his pleadings. With a defeated sigh Seiya stood, 

"good-bye odango" he called, then as he passed through he open door he spoke again his words all but lost "until we meet again" before he disappeared down the hallway, footsteps loud in the silence, unaware of a pair of narrowed midnight eyes tracing his progress.  

Back within her room, Usagi stared blankly ahead of her for a moment, then filled with some perverse desire, she wheeled over to the window, pulling herself out of her wheel chair to perch upon the window seat. She looked down into the courtyard, her hand pressed flat against the windowpane as she watched the slender form of her ex, walk across the parking lot towards his car. 

"Good-bye" she whispered, as much to him, as to the naïve careless girl that had thought she would spend the rest of her life with him. 

It was in this silent tableau, with her silver-kissed honey locks hiding her face from view, that Mamoru found her. 

He opened his mouth to speak, taunting comment on the tip of his tongue when he watcher her lift a hand to wipe it across her eyes. He bit back the comment as he wheeled into the room. Usagi, hearing the noise tilted her face towards him. 

Mamoru felt the breath go out of him, as he stared at the gorgeous face, tear tracks running down flushed cheeks from red-rimmed eyes. 

"Mamoru?" she whispered, eyes widening a bit in shock, as he moved closer, and then closer, one hand reaching out to catch a single tear as it squeezed from the corner of her cornflower eyes. 

"Usagi," he murmured, her name no longer merely consonants and vowels, but a thing to be cherished as his voice caressed its syllables before the air captured them. 

"What is wrong?" 

He had never before been affected such by a woman's tears, and with a compassion he had thought long forgotten he to pulled himself up to the window seat. Taking but a moment to settle himself, before she fell against him, crying pent up tears of frustration, and sorrow for what might have been. 

He did not know how long he held her, hands gently stroking her back as he tried to sooth her, unsure if he was doing the right thing, but convinced to stay by the slight tugging of her small hands wrapped in the folds of his shirt. At that moment nothing in the entire world could have stirred him to leave her, and as the weeping subsided her tilted her face upwards drying the last of her tears. It was only then that she seemed to sense the gravity of what had happened, 

"I'm… I'm sorry" she muttered 

"It's all right, but mind telling me what happened?" he stated, arms still wrapped unconsciously about her slender waist.   

"It's nothing" she murmured

Mamoru chuckled "that may work with other people Usa, but it won't work with me. You are too strong to weep for an hour or so over nothing"

Usagi pulled back then, sky meeting cobalt as they gathered the measure of what it was that lay between them now, and the possibilities of what could blossom from this encounter, 

"If I tell you everything IF," Usagi began, "you tell me your story?"

Mamoru gazed steadily at her, and then spoke his assent "all right." 

Thus began the breaching of the barrier each had built up to keep the other out, each of them knowing that the other had something that called to them, as a moth is called to the flame, each silently praying that they did not get burned, and so they stepped warily into courtships dance. At least as well as one can dance, when ones legs are no-longer able to bear weight upon them. 

TBC… 

thanks for reading, and don't forget to leave a review, to let me know if there is still interest. 

Sugargurl 

*hugs*


	8. chapter7

I am extreamely happy to report that all my exams are FINISHED!!! And I'm finally out of school for the summer…. Can you guess what that means? 

Yeps… you bet, I'm actually going to be Updating *looks around in shock* yes! At least once a week I'm praying unless I'm dragged off to my grandparents house (they don't have a computer)

So, here's part 7, and part 8 (which really could just be part 7 -2) is going to be out as soon as I finish it (which will be soon). So here u go, the moment you've all been waiting for…. 

MAMORU'S PAST!!!!

Enjoy…

Sugargurl… 

_I don't deserve to see you_

_I don't deserve to hold you_

_I don't deserve your concern_

_I don't deserve your friendship_

_And yet even in knowing I don't deserve your attention_

_Something in me longs for your comforting touch_

_You give me the hope to believe_

_ I am more than a broken shell_

Chapter 7

Usagi let out a deep breath her story completed, right up to the happenings of that morning. 

"That jerk!" Mamoru stated vehemently as his arms clutched protectively about her. Usagi laughed lightly, secretly liking this new side of him. 

"Its all right, I think I needed to see him" she reassured, "I needed to realize that, that portion of my life was over, and that I'd never have it back." 

Mamoru nodded, privately thinking that soon enough she would be living the way she had before the accident, walking on her own two legs… while he… well. He didn't allow his thoughts to continue along that route. For now it was enough just being able to comfort her, even if they could only ever be friends… or maybe if his luck somehow changed, friends with benefits.  

"So, are you ready to hold up your end of the deal?" she questioned. 

Mamoru sighed, he didn't really want to divulge into his former life, it was much too painful and even now guilt, still overwhelmed him.  

Usagi watched as his face scrunched up eyebrows drawing together in a frown, and his eyes glaze over. Slowly she raised a hand as if to stroke his cheek, her fingertips just brushing against his skin, as a knock on the door caused her to rapidly with draw it, and to move away. 

"Usagi are you in here" Makoto's voice preceded her as the door opened revealing her and Kevin. 

"Yea Mako. I'm here" Usagi responded, 

"Great... I just wanted to let you know that Kevin and I are going out with his family for the day…"

"Oh... all right" Usagi remarked, watching as Makoto wheeled around collecting her purse, and a jacket. 

" I guess we'll let you guys get back to whatever it was you were doing" Kevin teased from the door way as Mako wheeled back around with her supplies in hand. 

"We weren't doing anything!!!" Usagi exclaimed, a light pink blush blooming on her cheeks,

Mamoru merely waved calling, 

"Have a good time" and then Makoto was gone shouting a quick reminder to Usagi about an appointment, before the two were once more alone upon the window seat. 

"So… where were we?" Usagi began, turning her attention back to the handsome man beside her. 

Mamoru remained silent, watching as her brows scrunched in concentration, 

"Aha! That's right! You were going to tell me about yourself" Usagi grinned causing Mamoru to laugh despite himself, then knowing she would find out sooner or later he began his tale, his warm tenor now remorseful as he recollected the incident he so desperately wished to forget.  

            "Well, the accident occurred nearly two years ago… I was driving the family car, with my grandmother in the passenger seat, and my mom and sister in the back. I was just driving along, not speeding, I wasn't drunk, and everything was wonderful. We were all ready to go visit my uncle, my dad's brother, when it happened. A car in a neighboring lane lost control, and swerved into our lane." Here Mamoru paused, and Usagi squeezed his hand encouragingly,

            "Well, the car just suddenly swerved over, and I pulled on the wheel trying to get out of the way, and then I'm not sure exactly what happened. There was just a loud bang, and suddenly the car wasn't moving anymore. I wouldn't find out till later that the whole back end of the car had been crushed in, and the whole left side of the car was just crushed. Apparently they found my sisters body lying twenty feet away, blown clear out the window from the impact. She hadn't been wearing her seat belt, I remember that she'd been looking in the trunk for a drink just moments before. My mother too died at the scene and my grandmother later in hospital from her injuries. Then there was me, I'd suffered internal bleeding, a concussion, both my legs were broken, some ribs, and various other injuries. Yet I'm still alive…" he murmured at the end, looking at Usagi with glazed eyes. She could tell he wasn't really seeing her, as he re-lived the accident in his mind. 

"I killed them, I killed them all." He stated, coming back to himself. "Here I am, Mamoru the murderer. I shouldn't even be here, holding you like this or anything." He continued as he realized that he had his arms wrapped about her once more, just as hers were wrapped about him. Usagi pulled back to stare at him, her mouth dropping open, in disbelief 

"Yea… I better go" he continued pushing her out of his arms before manuvering himself into his wheel chair. He took one last look at her shocked face, and commented "I don't blame you for being disgusted, I'm disgusted with myself."   

She was totally stunned, her mouth opening and closing like that of some giant terrestrial fish, lips forming the word, _Wait…_ and yet she just couldn't seem to get it out. Instead she was frozen in place, watching as he wheeled towards the door; her heart aching for him within her breast, as she slowly came to realize why he didn't even try to get better. It wasn't that there was any physical inhibition; it was just that he didn't feel there was any point; it was as if he had nothing worth living for, and the seeds of guilt he'd sown within himself had slowly blossomed, fed by his uncle's actions towards him. 

The sound of the door closing spurred her into action. Quickly she set herself in her wheel chair and raced out the door after him. Once in the hallways she looked to the right and to the left, just catching a glimpse of his dark raven hair, before the elevator doors closed.  Mamoru's depreciating words, _I'm disgusted with myself,_ ran through her head once more serving to_ strengthen her resolve to find him._

She waited for the elevator, mulling over where he could have gone, and what she would tell him once she found him. The accident, well it wasn't his fault that his family members had died in that crash…. There really wasn't much he could have done to prevent it from happening, no more than she could have prevented that truck from hitting her car. She heaved a sigh as the elevator door parted before her, looking at the panel, she acted on instinct pressing the button for the roof. Having subconsciously decided that it was the best place to look for him, as no one else knew about their joyful evenings up there, besides it was the only place in the confounded grounds where one could go, and not be disturbed. 

Reviews?

Come on.. I know you want to give this starved writer some type of encouragement… 

After all more is coming shortly, just wanted to get this bit up!

Haa ha!!!

N don't think you're going to have this plot all figured out, i have a few more tricks up my sleeve. 

Thanks for reading… 

Sugargurl


	9. chapter 8

THANK YOU FOR YOUR WONDERFUL REVIEWS!!

(they are what makes me actually sit down and write)

Oy, the ending of this took a bit of thinking about. I was torn on whether or not to include the next part or so, but in the end decided that it could only make the bond b/w them stronger. 

Newayz… I hope you like it!

_I'll be your shoulder to cry on,_

_if_ you provide the tears__

_I'll be the one to hold you_

_If you bring me your fears_

_I'll be the one beside you_

_If you'll stand next to me_

_I'll be the one that loves you_

_Even if you don't love me.___

Chapter 8

As the elevator door opened, Usagi found herself faced with the not-quiet silent tableau of a grieving man. Quietly she wheeled herself out of the elevator towards him, slightly worried at his reaction to her presence, and yet there was no way she would leave him to face this alone. 

He turned to look at her with red rimmed haunted eyes, and a tear streaked face, his entire being expressing the single word "Why?" even as it escaped his lips to drift nearly unheard upon the currents of warm air. 

She didn't answer him, instead wheeling up beside him, to draw him as close as possible; one hand moving to stroke his back, even as she whispered reassurances into his ear. 

Mamoru lifted his head only once to look into her face, a look of startled bewilderment crossing his handsome features as she gently wiped a tear from his cheeks, and then it was if some invisible barrier within him had broken. He buried his face in her shoulder, great heaving sobs shaking his frame as he grieved, unashamed, for those he loved. 

Usagi remained quiet, one hand soothingly stroking his strong back as his tears soaked into the material of her t-shirt, she remained still even after his breathing had quieted determined to provide the support he needed as his remaining family had failed to do. 

The pair sat in silence for some time, neither wanting the other to move, and yet the moment could not last as Usagi's watch beeped informing her she had a mere five minutes before her appointment. 

"Mamo-chan, I have to go now" she told him, pushing his thick bangs back so that she could look him in the eyes. 

He nodded to indicate that he had understood, as he pulled back releasing his hold on her. Reaching out a hand, Usagi tilted his head up, so that he was looking her straight in the eyes, 

"it wasn't your fault" she murmurs, quickly leaning down to kiss his forehead before wheeling back to the elevator, leaving Mamoru with a look of pure amazement on his face.

**********

Usagi made it to Dr. Kerr's office right on time, and was surprised at the sound of her parent's familiar voices within. 

"Mom? Dad?" she called wheeling in through the open door "what are you doing here?" 

"well Usagi, we asked to be called in when Dr Kerr here felt that you were ready to take the next step." 

Usagi looked at them slightly puzzled, sure she was now able to stand on her own for longer periods of time, and her legs were not as week, but with her thoughts focused on Mamoru's problems she just wasn't thinking clearly.

Dr. Kerr chuckled and reaching behind the "torture table" as Usagi had dubbed it, he pulled out a walker. 

Usagi stared at it blankly for a moment, then as finally realizing what was happening she grinned, "you mean I'm ready to leave my chair??" 

"yes Usa" her mother affirmed.  

Still grinning, Usagi reached out to take hold of the walker as she placed both her feet on the floor before slowly standing. 

Dr. Kerr smiled, "ok Usagi, are you ready to walk?" 

She nodded, and carefully placed one foot in front of the other just like they'd practiced and stepped out of his office into the hallway, her parents following after.

 They walked in silence for a distance, her parents exchanging glances behind her backs, and then with a slight nod of her head Usagi's dad opened his mouth to speak. 

"Usa" he began

"Yes Dad?" she answered turning to smile at him

"your mother and I have been thinking, and we decided that it would be best if you came home soon."

"what do you mean??" she questioned totally shocked at this turn of events

"well, we were talking to Dr. Kerr, and he said that you will probably be able to come home as your legs will be strong enough to carry you around with help from the walker..." he trailed off

" you mean I won't need my wheel chair?" 

"no, you will have to take it easy at first, but everyday you can spend more time out of your chair" her mother stated "Dr. Kerr said that in 2 months time or so you should be completely independent from the chair, and then after that ready for leg braces." 

Usagi stared blankly at her mother, 

"Usagi, we decided that you would be leaving here in two weeks"  her father finished looking at his daughter, and then at his wife a concerned expression upon his face. 

"leave here?" Usagi repeated still shocked, "you mean go home? Like where all my friends are!" 

"yes Usagi, home." He mother affirmed as they rounded the corner into the lobby. 

"USA-CHAN!!!!" a simultaneous shout of delight at the appearance of their friend burst from a group of three girls that had prior to her appearance been sitting on a couch, and were now dashing towards her. 

"Mina-chan, Rei-chan, Ami-chan!! What are you doing here????" Usagi exclaimed in delight. 

"we came to see you odango brain" Rei teased giving the blonde a hug. 

"Rei! Don't call me that! Its bad enough with HIM calling me that, I don't need you at it too" 

The other two laughed as their friends taunted, and teased each other, only interfering when it looked like they were about ready to gouge each-others' eyes suggesting that they head outside Minako happily producing a bag of snakes, and other such gals night surprises. 

Usagi smiled in delight, following her friends out through the front door.; secretly torn between spending time with her best buds, and the fact that she had promised Mamoru that she would return after her appointment. 

Up in his room Mamoru heard the commotion of female voices laughing, and calling out Usagi's name, curious he wheeled closer to the edge and looked down in time to see them disappear underneath a tree. 

He sat in stunned silence, his mind slowly processing the fact that yes, Usagi had been standing. 

"shit" he cursed "its only a matter of time now, and then she'll be gone too" he felt his heart contract painfully in his chest at the thought of being anywhere with out her. 

"what's happening to me" he wondered aloud, after all he had only known Usagi for six months. He had lived a full 19years with out her, why shouldn't he be able to live without her again. 

He sighed, wheeling away from the window towards the center of the room. His thoughts churned in his mind,

_She's going to be leaving soon… I don't want to stay here any longer, but what can I do?_

 His glance fell upon the desk that had been pushed up against one wall. Slowly he wheeled over, and opened the bottom drawer to reveal some text books.

_I'm almost done the course_.... his thought, thinking about all that had happened between them. 

_I have to at least try... I may feel unworthy of life, but… if I'm ever going to get out of here. Ever going to have a chance of seeing her again once she leaves… I'm going to have to learn to walk…_ he decided, then laughed bitterly, 

_That is if she even wants to see me again…_

 a small wistful smile crept onto his face as he heard the sound of happy laughter once more, and in his heart of hearts, he concluded that it was one of the most beautiful sounds he had ever heard.

**************

Outside Usagi was having so much fun, her friends were acting just as they had before the accident, and she was happy that she'd soon be going back to live among them. 

Unfortunately, like all good things, they had to leave eventually, as the staff had already bended the rules in allowing them to stay for dinner, and now it was fast approaching 7:30 the ultimate end of visiting hours.  

"Bye guys! Come visit me again!!!" she called as they walked out of the lobby. 

Minako laughed, "of course Usagi-chan!! We'll try to come… the week after next!"

Rei, and Ami agreed, waving cheerfully as they piled into Ami's car, and then they were gone, leaving Usagi alone at the door.

Slowly Usagi turned and wheeled back into the lobby towards the elevator, having dumped the walker in favor of her chair, as the Dr. Kerr had sternly instructed that she didn't over do it. 

A soft ping informed her that the elevator had arrived, and she quickly pressed the button which would take her up to her floor. Upon arriving she wheeled out, and went to see if Mamoru was in his room. 

"Mamoru? Are you in there?" she called through the empty door. She was answered by silence, and so after a quick peek inside the room, confirming that neither he, nor Kevin were anywhere to be seen she continued down the hall to her room. 

"mako-chan? Are you here?" she called softly as she entered the room they shared, only to be answered by the sound of the water running in the bathroom. 

_That's odd…_ Usagi thought as she headed closer to the door. 

"Makoto? Are you in there? It's me Usagi.." 

Usagi still received no answer, and so she cautiously turned the door knob, letting the door swing open to reveal the site within. 

Usagi stared, completely shocked for a moment, one hand pressed firmly to her chest as she struggled to get her breathing under control, all the time muttering, 

"makoto what were you thinking?" as she stared down at her room mate, before letting out a scream of terror as the reality of the situation sunk in. 

Authors Note:

*sniffles* i'm sorry everyone, but its torture Makoto & Kevin time!

Uhh… yes, i promise there is a reason behind all this

until next time… 

Sugar...


	10. chapter 9

Chapter 9

Nurses pounded down the corridor in response to Usagi's terrified cry, even as the floor's occupants opened their doors to see what was causing the commotion. 

"Everyone, back in your rooms!" some of the nurses ordered, while one rushed to Usagi's side to see what the matter was. 

"Oh my god, oh my God" Usagi muttered, her face growing grey with shock. 

"Quick, get her out of here" the nurse ordered, upon glancing into the bathroom.

 Usagi soon found herself being pushed purposefully down the hallway, all the while demanding to know if Makoto would be all right. 

"Hush dear, she'll be fine" the nurse attempted to soothe, but the underlying concern in her voice gave her away. The situation was even more serious than Usagi had thought, as she wondered what could have possibly gone wrong to cause her friend to do such a thing. 

"Hey! What's going on?" a male voice called causing the nurse to pause and turn to face the speaker.  As soon as Usagi spotted him, she burst out into tears, and he immediately wheeled to her side. 

The nurse watched the exchange, managing to look Mamoru in the eyes over the distraught girls head. 

Mamoru nodded firmly indicating that he would take responsibility for the bawling girl. Then he slowly disentangled himself from the blonde long enough for the nurse to wheel Usagi into his room, before shutting the door as she left. 

"Usagi, Are you all right?" he questioned gently as she clung tightly to him. 

"Oh god, Mamoru…she was practically blue…" Usagi choked out, "and lying so still… I thought she was dead until her fingers closed." 

"Probably took some pills…" Mamoru thought out loud

"Why? how could she do such a thing, she was so happy this morning."

Mamoru held her close, until her tears subsided. He had a pretty good idea of what had finally tipped Makoto over the edge, as she really had only been holding on to sanity by a slender thread. A thread named Kevin,

"Hush" he murmured stroking her back, "look at me, there are things about Makoto that she doesn't tell anybody, things she doesn't wish them to know." 

Usagi pulled back only to find she drowning in his pain clouded midnight eyes. 

"What do you mean? She told me about her father and all of that…I just don't get it, she just seemed so happy." 

Mamoru sighed, "Yes, it was her little act. Her way of fighting the depression and the pain that threatened to eat her up from the inside out, and Kevin, he was the one that got her to put that aside, to let it go and just be herself again." 

Usagi nodded, her thoughts briefly touching the time in her life when suicide had been a very real option; then as she glanced around the room she asked, 

 "Where is Kevin? I didn't see him at dinner…" 

"He's gone." Mamoru commented bluntly, "His parents took him home today as his grandmother is dying"

"Oh... then when's he coming back?" 

"He isn't… his family decided that he would be able to get well at home just as well as here." 

"Oh god…" Usagi gasped finally beginning to comprehend why Makoto had done what she did, "I guess she thinks that there is nothing worth living for…" she mused 

Mamoru nodded his head sadly, looking at her from the corner of his eye. He knew what it felt like to be forgotten by the people that were supposed to love you, yet he had been too stubborn to die, and had hung on in a kind of limbo. 

The pair sat companionably in a suffering silence, each wondering what was going to happen to their friend, and thinking of their own struggles with the feelings that had led her to make the choice she had. 

Finally, the sound of sirens roaring up the driveway prompted them to wheel over to the window, where the Ambulance was pulling up. 

"Oh god Makoto, what did you do to yourself?" Mamoru muttered, and then the pair fell silent once more; each thankful that the other was still in one piece. 

The next morning dawned bright and sunny; Usagi awoke in a state of confusion, to find herself wrapped up in a strong embrace, a warm wall of muscle. 

'_What? Where am I?'_ She asked herself, as her blue eyes fluttered open only to reveal the interior of Mamoru's room. 

_'How'd I get here?'_ she questioned, then as the memories came back her body convulsed in a small shudder. 

"Usagi are you all right?" Mamoru's warm voice came from behind her, his warm breath sending shivers up her spine even as his arms tightened about her waist. 

Usagi sighed as she leaned into him, happy to let all her troubles go for awhile as she relaxed in the safety that was his embrace. 

"I'm fine" she replied as she rolled over to face him, and found herself staring directly at the base of his throat. She smiled slightly to herself letting her eyes drift up over the creamy column of his throat, past his defined jaw, fine boned cheeks, to the twin pools of Deep Ocean blue that were his eyes. Usagi's breath caught in her throat at the emotions she found there as he looked at her through a sleep filled haze, unable to tear her gaze away she watched his face move closer, his hand under her chin tilting her face up to meet his.

_'oh god, he's going to kiss me'_ she thought, but before the promised event could occur the door opened behind them, and they were forced to move apart. 

"Good morning you two" a nurse greeted cheerfully, 

"How is Makoto?" Usagi demanded as she sat up in the bed. 

"Oh, Makoto is fine, she had her stomach pumped and is resting comfortably in the hospital."

The pair sighed in relief that their friend was going to be all right, 

"That's wonderful" Mamoru commented, as Usagi asked, 

"When is she coming back?" 

The nurse just shrugged, "I don't know… but Usagi the director would like to see you." 

"Why?" 

"I'm not sure, but I'm assuming that they want to figure out why she did what she did. Oh! And your parents are coming out this afternoon." 

"Oh..." Usagi mouthed looking over at Mamoru, as she thought of what had almost happened between them. 

"Well, breakfast is in fifteen minuets" the nurse informed Mamoru as she wheeled Usagi's chair closer to the bed. "Come on then, you're eating upstairs"

Usagi nodded, and manuvered herself into the chair, sitting calmly as the nurse began to wheel her out of the room.  

"Usagi?" Mamoru began causing the blonde to turn to look at him, 

"Yes?" 

"Just, promise me you'll come back to say goodbye" 

Usagi's brow creased in confusion, and then the door was shut preventing her from asking him what he meant. 

AN: 

Comments? 

Yes, the story is slowly wrapping up, but you will find out what happens with Makoto n all before the end..


	11. chapter 10

Chapter 10
    
    Usagi remained silent all throughout the trip up to the director's office wondering why they wanted to see her, and why Mamoru had said what he had.
    
    "We're here" the nurse stated as she knocked lightly on a door,
    
    "Come in" came a voice from within, and then the nurse opened the door to reveal a middle-aged woman sitting behind a desk.
    
    "Hello Usagi, I'm Ms. Malone."
    
    "Nice to meet you" Usagi responded taking the pro-offered hand and giving it a firm shake.
    
    "Before we begin with the real reason as to why you are here, would you care for something to eat?" questioned Ms. Malone gesturing towards the tray of pastries.
    
    Usagi nodded, accepting a plate before taking Danish from the tray.
    
    "Now then" the directress began, "we were wondering if you had any information as to why Makoto acted the way she did."
    
    Usagi stared blankly at the woman, silently debating whether or not to tell the woman what she knew about Makoto's family life and relationship with Kevin.
    
    The director sighed pleading,
    
    "Usagi, we can not help her if we do not know what is wrong"
    
    The blonde haired girl looked at her hands in her lap, not knowing what to say, then taking a deep breath began,
    
    "You must know what her relationship with her family is like…how they never come to visit her, hardly ever call, and every so often write, and to her friends she might as well be dead. To Makoto the world is not a particularly friendly place, she can't walk, nor is it likely that she ever will be able to do so again. She feels lost, hopeless, and was really only holding on because for awhile she had something to live for, she had someone that would be devastated if anything should happen to her, but he left a little while ago without even saying good-bye. Think of how horrible she must have felt, when the one person she dared to trust suddenly vanished without a trace."
    
    The directress looked at the slender girl across from her and handed her a tissue to dry her eyes,
    
    "Do you know how she got the pills?"
    
    Usagi shook her head, "who knows, she could have saved them."
    
    "Hmmm" Ms. Malone pondered, her lips pressed firmly together as she thought it over, "well then, thank you for your help miss Tuskino."
    
    "You're welcome." Usagi responded, turning at the sound of a knock on the door.
    
    "Come in." the directress beckoned, as the door opened to reveal her assistant.
    
    "Mr. and Mrs. Tuskino to see you." the woman stated as said couple walked past her and into the office.
    
    "Oh Usa, are you all right?" asked Mrs. Tuskino giving her daughter a hug.
    
    "I'm fine Mom, just fine. What are you doing here?"
    
    "Well Usagi," began her father bending down, "after hearing the news your mother and I decided that you are going to be leaving Cherry Tree this week."
    
    "What??" the blonde exclaimed looking at her parents in shock.
    
    "We just think that it would be better if you came home now." her mother said offering no real explanation as to their motives.
    
    "…. But… I want to stay." Usagi whined thinking of her budding relationship with the aloof Mamoru.
    
    "I'm sorry Usa, but that isn't an option. You'll be here another three days to learn all the exercises, and that should give us enough time to locate a Physiotherapist near home."
    
    Secretly furious that she had not been consulted Usagi wheeled out of the room with out saying anything more to her parents.
    
    _How dare they do this to me? I want to stay and help Mako. and what about Mamoru? Am I just supposed to forget all about him? It's just not fair. I'm not ready to go home quite yet_. She fumed savagely pressing the down arrow button, and then the appropriate number which would take her to her floor.
    
    Usagi was upset, and didn't want to see nor talk to anyone as she wheeled down the hall towards her room, quickly opening the door and slamming it shut behind her.
    
    Mamoru watched Usagi wheel quickly past, her long pigtails streaming out behind her,
    
    _I wonder what's wrong…_ he thought to himself wheeling out of his room in time to see the door slam shut behind her.
    
    Deep in thought he propelled himself down the hall stopping in front of her door.
    
    Taking a deep breath he knocked, something he had never done before, and called,
    
    "Usagi, are you all right?"
    
    "Just go away" she shot back her voice slightly muffled
    
    "What's wrong?" he tried again
    
    "Nothing, now just leave me alone."
    
    Mamoru was slightly stunned at her savage tone, so reaching out he turned the doorknob, opening the door just enough so that he could see in.
    
    "Usa…"
    
    "I thought I told you to piss off."
    
    Annoyed he replied, "I'm not leaving until you tell me what's the matter" and wheeled into the room
    
    Usagi turned to look at him through narrowed eyes, her fists clenched upon the arms of her wheel chair,
    
    "You want to know what's wrong?" she demanded, "What's wrong is that Makoto is very sick and will most likely end up in a mental institute, my parents are being over protective, and I…" her voice faltered as she struggled to choke back tears, "I'm leaving soon."
    
    Mamoru stared at her for a moment, and as her words sunk in he wheeled over reaching out a hand in order to comfort her.
    
    "Don't touch me." Usagi hissed between tears as she jerked away from the contact. He paid her no heed instead placing his arm upon her back,
    
    "I said no." she sobbed turning her head to bury her face in his shoulder
    
    Mamoru ran his hand down her back and whispered,
    
    "Hush Odango, everything will turn out just fine in the end."
    
    Usagi didn't speak merely struggled to get her emotions under control.
    
    "Usagi?" a voice intruded from the door as her mother looked in upon the tender exchange between the too young people.
    
    Mamoru looked up as the woman walked over, silently requesting that he leave. Sighing he did as she bid him, carefully unwrapping Usagi's hands from where they clung to him,
    
    "I have to go Usa; I think your mom wants to speak to you"
    
    "Don't leave." she whispered in reply her fingers slowly retreating down his arm, as he pulled away.
    
    "Thank you" Usagi's mother said to Mamoru as he wheeled out the door, and as he reached behind him to close it he called,
    
    "Don't forget your promise." and then he was gone, leaving the girl and the woman to themselves.

Hope you enjoyed reading that,  big thanks to Asma for beta-reading.

And to all of you for your support ^_^ it means a lot to me

sugar. 


	12. chapter eleven

I was just reading this over and realized my shift from 3rd to 1st person near the bottom of this chapter. Sorry about that, It's all fixed now. 

**Chapter 11**

"Usagi" her mother began reaching out to put her hand upon her daughter's shoulder only to have Usagi pull away

"I don't feel like talking to you right now" she commented stiffly wheeling over to the window

"Usagi" her mother repeated walking towards the blond, "you know it would never work out…" 

The girl remained silent making no indication that she had understood, 

"Between you, and that boy I mean"

"I heard you mother, but you don't know anything about the situation. Besides I have other reasons for wanting to stay. I mean, what about Makoto? If she comes back and fines me gone, she'll think I abandoned her just like all her other friends" Usagi wailed

"Usa, she's not coming back" her mother explained 

"What? What do you mean??" 

"Well, they'll be taking her to a place with higher levels of supervision to ensure that she doesn't try something like that again…" 

"…. But that isn't the problem. She isn't really suicidal; it's just that… her life is so difficult right now."

"Hush Usa, it's for the best, the people there will be able to help her.

"No they won't, they won't be able to do a damn thing for her. If her family hasn't visited her while she's been here, then what makes you think they'll want to visit her there? It's even more shameful to have a child in a psychiatric ward, than just in physiotherapy, besides the person that she loves, and trusts the most probably won't be allowed to go see her. "

"Stop it! Stop it right now young lady, you are no psychologist so don't even start with the psycho-analysis." 

The blond glared darkly, "she won't get any better there mom. More than likely she'll remain there until the day she dies, completely alone and forgotten." 

"then that is what will happen, because you are leaving here in two days time, whether you want to or not. As for Makoto, there is nothing you can do about it as her family has the final say. If you want, you can write to her but other than that…."

Usagi turned from her mother once again no longer wanting to hear what she had to say, "good-bye mother. I really don't feel like talking anymore" 

"Usagi, we have to get this resolved. You must understand that your father and I are only concerned for your health and feel that it would be better if we got you away from here and these unstable influences." 

"Mother, they need me, but since I can't change your mind I'm going to spend as much time with them as I can before I go away" with those words the wheel-chair bound girl left the room, and wheeled off down the hall towards the elevator. 

_God I need to think _she muttered to herself as she pressed the button which would take her up to the roof. 

********

Left alone in the room Usagi's mother burst out into tears. She knew that it was the right decision to remove her daughter from this environment contaminated by emotionally unstable individuals, and yet she couldn't help doubting it after her daughter's words. 

It was obvious that these people had some type of a hold on her daughter, and Irene knew how seriously her daughter took friendship. 

_What if that Makoto girl does die there? _She thought knowing that her daughter would be angry if anything happened to Makoto. Irene knew that if the girl fell into a beeper depression that Usagi would blame her for not allowing her to go and visit her. Yet the sooner Usagi left this place the better,  as that way all contact between Usagi and these dangerous individuals would cease. 

_Two days_ we told her thought the blonde's mother, _but maybe it would be better if we left immediately.  No! I cant' do that to her, she'll hate me' _the woman sobbed, _but you must…it's in her best interest.  She was still crying when her husband entered the room minutes later. _

"What's wrong?" Kenji asked his wife as he sat down upon the bed and wrapped his arms about her waist. 

"Its Usagi, she doesn't want to leave…I...I think she has become too attached to these people." The woman admitted

"Attached how?" he questioned his eyes darkening as he thought of the way that Mamoru had been eyeing his daughter. 

"She said that she didn't want to leave her room-mate, something about the girl thinking that Usagi has abandoned her like everyone else" 

"hmm... Sounds to me like that girl is emotionally unstable" 

"I know… and besides I heard that Makoto was going to be moved, but I don't think its just that… she and that boy were in a rather compromising position when I came in"

"I'll KILL HIM!!!" Kenji raged seeing red. How dare some boy touch his precious daughter? 

"Now, now, dear no need to be violet… I just think we should take her home as soon as possible before she gets even more attached."

The woman watched as her husband mulled before speaking, 

"yes she should, it'll be better for her. She will be able to forget about these people, and their problems, and will no longer be exposed to their emotional troubles"  he agreed, "why don't you pack her things, she should come home tonight, all other arrangements can be made once we get home." 

Irene's eyes opened wide in shock, "but darling, don't you think that's a little soon?" 

"no, she was leaving in two days anyways. We can save ourselves the trip this way, and prevent any more of this teenage nonsense." With that Kenji stood up mentioning that he was going to talk to Ms. Malone about their decision. 

*************************

_why__? why? why? why does it feel like the world is shattering around me? Why do my parents have to be so stubborn? Why do I feel so empty inside? Why do I feel so lost? I'm going home, home… to the place I lived before this mess began, back to the place where my best friends are. Why am I so empty? Usagi asked herself in the wind filled silence of the room-top, as the sun slowly descended in the western sky, _why don't they let me stay here where people need me. Why can't I stay? He needs me, I need him. Makoto needs me too. They have nobody, nobody but me…_ she thought as the air became chill, finally prompting her to return to the warmth of the building, prompting her to go look for Mamoru in order to spend as much time by his side as was possible before her parents dragged her away, back to the place she had spent so many of her happiest moments. _

Still deep in thought Usagi underwent the necessary motions in order to arrive where she was, just outside of his door; her hand mere millimeters from the wood of the door.

"Usagi! There you are" she heard one of the nurses exclaim, "your parents have been looking all over for you." 

Usagi looked over at the woman, "oh, they're still here?" 

"yes dear, didn't they tell you that they were taking you home today?" 

"Today?" she repeated in shock, "but they said I had two days…"

"Well, whatever they said you are going home tonight, I'll just take you to them now." The nurse continued moving to take up the handles of Usagi's wheel chair. 

"no!" the girl cried out, "I, I have a promise to keep" she explained willing the nurse to go away. 

"well... I don't know dear, you really should be going." 

"NO! I have to do this, I promised… just, tell me where they are and I'll go down when I'm done" Usagi pleaded. Her eyes round disks of hope as she looked up at the nurse trying hard not to cry, "Please, I promised…" 

the nurse sighed, "oh all right I'll go down to the waiting room and tell them you'll be coming down in say fifteen-twenty minutes?" 

"Thank you" the blonde breathed turning her attention back to the door as the nurse walked away.  

"Mamoru?" she questioned rapping lightly upon the wooden surface. 

"Come in" he called back in his deep warm voice. 

Opening the door Usagi wheeled inside her eyes taking in the site of his deep blue eyes as he turned to look at her. 

"Usagi?" he questioned "what are you doing here??" 

"well… I've come to say goodbye" she told him while struggling to keep her emotions under control, 

"oh…" he mouthed turning so that his chair was facing the other direction. "I suppose you're glad to be leaving" he continued his voice bitter. "You can go home and goof around with all your friends just like you used to while everyone here struggles on"

"Stop it!" Usagi demanded struggling to keep her voice steady through the tears running down her cheeks "it's not my fault… I don't want to go"

slowly he turned to face her, his expression remorseful as he looked into the girls red-ringed eyes. 

"I'm sorry" he told her, reaching out a hand to her. Tentatively Usagi took it, and upon her still unsteady legs stood for a moment before falling into Mamoru's lap with a laugh.

"my father would kill you if he saw us" she remarked as she traced her fingertips along his jaw, and up over his lips. 

"it would be worth it" Mamoru breathed barely daring to move as he looked into her eyes

"promise me you'll get out of here" Usagi implored as her hands dove into his midnight hair, 

"I promise" he replied

"Promise me you'll write to me" 

"I promise" he answered his arms moving to wrap about her slender waist as she moved her head to whisper in his ear, 

"promise you'll come to see me"

Mamoru gasped at her words, and at the long forgotten sensations that ran through him forcing him to struggle to maintain control as he responded

"I promise" 

"Good" Usagi replied her face mere millimeters from his as she whispered "because I wouldn't want this to be the only time we did this" before sealing the gap,

Mamoru's eyes opened wide in shock, the instant he felt her lips brush tentatively against his. Acting on instinct he tightened his hold on her waist, as his other hand buried itself in the hair at the nape of her neck. Through that simple contact he tried to let her know every half-recognized emotion he felt towards her, willing Usagi to understand what she meant to him as he nibbled lightly on her bottom lip gaining entrance to the sweet warm cavity of her mouth. 

Usagi moaned at the passion of his kiss, at the emotions his touch caused to swell and burn within her. It was a sensation like she had never experienced before, and as they reluctantly pulled apart, chests heaving as they struggled to regain their breath, she closed her eyes and traced the features of his face,

"Usagi" Mamoru breathed, "Look at me" 

The slender blonde opened her cornflower eyes, her hand stilling as it cupped his cheek. 

"I promise you that I'll get better. I promise that I'll write, and I Promise that I'll come to see you, but you have to promise me one thing" he stated as his stomach tumbled in knots as he thought about what he was going to ask, 

"What is it?" she asked smiling sweetly at him

"Promise me you'll wait for me" 

As his words sunk in Usagi grasped the full gravity of what he was asking. If she agreed it meant that she would not date anyone else, she would have admitted herself to celibacy for an indefinite time. It would be as if she had a boyfriend, one that she was unable to see, fell, smell, and touch. If she agreed to this she would be bound to him by her words until the day came that he showed up on her doorstep walking on his own two legs. 

Inwardly she blanched slightly at this thought, but as she looked him in the eye, remembered the emotions he had awakened within her, felt his arms wrapped about her, and inhaled his unique scent of cinnamon and roses she felt herself nod. 

 She could do this, for as she paused to think about it, she realized she cared more for this handsome emotional-wreck of a man than she had cared for Seiya in all two years of their relationship. 

"Alright" she murmured looking him in the eyes, "I'll wait for you" 

Mamoru grinned, causing Usagi's heart to beat faster. Then as her watch beeped marking the hour, she realized that she had to leave. 

"time for you to go?" Mamoru questioned

"yes" Usagi replied returning to her wheel chair, leaning across the arm rests to give him one last kiss before she wheeled to the door. 

"I'll tell you what happens between Makoto and Kevin" the raven haired man called, "I don't think he'll be too pleased when he hears about where she has been moved to."

Usagi laughed lightly as she passed through the wooden archway, pausing a moment to call

 "send them both my love and Mamoru… I'll keep you in my heart" before she shut the door behind her. 

Inside the room Mamoru felt the sad feeling of closure, as he heard the sounds of car doors slamming in the parking lot below, it was as if some part of him was saying

_She's gone now, gone forever_ but that voice was quickly silenced by the memory of her fingers gently caressing the side of his face. The echo of her voice ringing through his head as it extracted those promises. 

"I will leave this place" he stated boldly, continuing "I'll leave it for everything that could be between her and I. I'll leave this chair behind, so that like she did today, I'll be able to stand up and walk from this chair and into her arms." his voice rang true, filled with determination, and his thoughts, equally determined echoed the sentiment, 

_I'll do it so that I too will be able to stand up and walk to my lovers arms. _

Authors Note: 

I wanted to say Thank you very much for all of your support and I am glad that everyone enjoyed this fic. 

Personally I had a lot of fun writing this story, and I hope I succeeded in moving you at one point or another. 

Galene~

P.S.

Once again it has been a pleasure hearing from all of you and my never-ending thanks for your confidence in my abilities, and your patience

Milady godess, moon writer, Sailor Phoenix, Severyn, schoolgirltill2005, 2cute4comfort, kirei*snow*tenshi, moonbunny, ilusiongirl, Cindy, Lauren, iceAngel, Sylvia Cater, EO, Stephanie, Neo Cristal Serenity, Princess Serenity, Deny, and anyone else that i have missed. 


	13. Epilogue

AN: *sniffles* I'm going to miss this fic.

_Epilogue_

Seconds had turned into minutes, minutes into hours, hours to day, days to weeks, weeks to months, and months into a year. 

One full revolution of the Earth about the sun had passed since Usagi had left cherry Tree. A year that had seemed to span a lifetime as Usagi and Mamoru wrote to one another, their letters filled with their hopes, dreams, successes, disappointments, encouragements, and longings. Each printed word a testament of the lingering bond between them, of the deep rooted belief that they would see each other once again, but it had been a month since Usagi had last received a letter from him.

 A month of continued improvement of her physical condition while her emotions raged within her going from anger, to sorrow, to the deep agony that tortured her as she longed for him. Hours spent in secret wonderings as to what had happened to the man that she had come to rely upon, the man that she had willingly given her heart to along with her dreams for her future, and now as the month passed heading into two she felt her hope of ever hearing from him again falter. 

Yet it had not been a month completely devoid of hope, as Makoto had written saying that she and Kevin, whom had gone to retrieve her, were engaged. Usagi smiled as she remembered the ecstatic words printed in Makoto's copper-plate script, followed by Kevin's neat proclamations of his own delight on a separate piece of paper, both reinforcing that they wanted her to take part in the wedding party. 

Usagi sighed, she knew that the jealousy she felt towards the pair was wrong, and that it was only because she was missing Mamoru, and now, with out the comfort of his weekly letters she was beginning to wonder if he had forgotten about her. 

~ 

The ringing of the doorbell interrupted the blonde's reflection, so with a sigh she stood up. Taking careful steps Usagi made her way towards the front door to look through the peep hole. 

_Oh my god_ she thought her breath rushing out of her lungs as she opened the door, 

"Mamoru?" she questioned tentatively as she looked up at the raven haired man before her, her eyes scanning every inch of his face, hands itching to brush an unruly lock of hair back so that she would be able to see into his deep midnight pools.  

"Usagi" he breathed, smiling down at her. "I kept my promises" 

With a laugh the blonde grinned back, and stepped closer wrapping her arms about him in her joy at seeing him again. 

"It's so good to see you" she breathed, before demanding "why haven't you been writing?" 

"I'm sorry" he replied his voice filled with regret, "just I had some exams to write, and then I went to see the lawyers about my Father's company. I own Chiba productions did you know that?... well I suppose you didn't, but now you do!" he babbled his words silenced by a finger against his lips, 

"Don't speak" she murmured, gazing deeply up into his eyes as the fingers of her other hand buried themselves in his hair, "just kiss me" 

Mamoru moaned as he felt the full length of her body press against his, even as their lips met. His hands moved one falling to rest in the small of her back, the other wrapped in her loose golden tresses even as his tongue slipped through her parted lips to taste the sweetness of her warm mouth, fueling the flames of his long suppressed desire. 

Usagi feeling her desire threatening to consume her moaned. She was finally back where she belonged, here, in the arms of this strong, compassionate individual, and as their tongues battled for dominance her hands ran the length of his back feeling the muscles flex as he shuddered under her touch. 

When the need for oxygen finally became too great, the couple still stayed wrapped in each others embrace, Usagi's head resting in the hollow of Mamoru's throat listening to his erratically beating heart. 

"I love you" the man gasped out between breaths as he tightened his grip on her waist. 

"I love you too" she replied, her words giving him the courage he needed to finish what he had come to her house to do, 

"Say you'll stay with me Usagi" he began "you won't want for anything, and you won't have to work unless you want to. I… I just don't ever want to live with out you again" 

Usagi smiled at the anxiety in his voice. _He is so cute sometimes; does he actually think that I'll say no?_

"neither do I" she began pulling back her eyes serious as she gazed lovingly up at him. "Now, shut up and kiss me" 

~*~

_I've been through many hardships_

_Not always wanting to go on_

_But now I see the reason behind God's master plan_

_He put me through the trials_

_Dragged me through the pain_

_Then he sent me you, to help me fight my way out again_

_I once sat before you, with two useless legs_

_Yet I fought to over come them, _

_To walk to see you once again_

_So here I am before you_

_Standing all alone_

_Holding out my heart towards you as you hold out your own_

_I know that I love you_

_I know that I need your strength _

_So take that step towards me, _

_Take that leap of faith_

_Fall instep beside me_

_And together we shall remain_

_Hand in hand, _

_Heart in heart_

_Stride in stride_

_For now, _

_Forever_

_Walking side by side_

_~*~_

Authors Note: 

That's the end *sniffles* I can't believe I'm done. I don't want it to be over *wails* 

I think this is my fav. fan-fic to date. *hugs it* and I wanted to say THANK YOU ALL!! 

I love you, and I loved writing this for you. 

Thanks from the bottom of my heart for everthing

~ Sugar


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